I am pretty regular and follow proper hygiene. I wipe properly and even use baby-wipes after most bowel movements. Staying clean is not a problem. But I’ve got a kind of anal stench that permeates no matter how much I use the bathroom.
What's more: I don't even have to actually USE the toilet for the smell to appear. I could, for example, just sit bare-bottomed on the throne for a minute or two and get up without actually having done #2, and the stench would be there. And what's even more: it doesn't go away for some time. It seems to have to wear off or something.
Even if I have to go, and even if I use some kind of air freshener afterwards, the air in the bathroom may be "fresh"-smelling -- but when you get close to the toilet the stench remains on the seat and "above the water," even if the air is clear.
What causes this? How does one combat it? Does it speak of a possible health issue (hemorrhoids or a fistula, perhaps)? Is there anything that can be done to get rid of it so I'm not embarrassed when the next person comes along?
Dear NADP,
I have given your problem considerable thought (at least 5 minutes), and have come to the conclusion that even though I have never seen you, I bet you are not anorexic. In fact, I would guess that you have a fairly deep "gluteal crevice", or in layman's terms, ass crack.
The surface area of skin-to-skin, or shall we say cheek to cheek contact in the immediate vicinity of the anus is prone to becoming permeated with not so pleasant odors throughout the day simply due to the natural passing of gas and sweating that occurs. The bigger the butt, the more surface area there is to attain a stinkiness. When you sit upon the throne, the touching parts are suddenly separated, letting the smell out.
To remedy this problem, you could try using a deodorant spray along with a sprinkle of fresh powder in the crack in addition to making a point several times daily to let some fresh air into the crack by maybe dropping things and squatting to pick them up (so as not to look suspicious, you know). Also, try spraying the air freshener closer to the toilet and stop bending over to smell the seat. I doubt if the person coming in behind you is going to do that.
Thanks for asking Motherload!
Motherload is a Certified Nurse Assistant as well as an IBS sufferer, which means she knows a lot about poop. Got a question for her? Ask it here. [1]