If someone has gone thru the trouble of calling me and actually reaching me while I'm home then I don't resist the urge when it hits. I have very little time to spend on things these days so I'm often "multi-tasking" while on the hopper.

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Rock-n-roll! Poopy-poo!

I can't imagine another reason why cordless phones were invented. I always leave the noises up to the other persons imagination.

I voted "seldom...explain when necessary" only because the cat will yowl on occasion.

I voted for seldom. There are times when I am on the phone while I am pooping. Most notably, is when my wife calls me on my cell whilst taking my morning shit. She is used to it though, and now asks me whether or not I am in the bathroom. In general, I will not let the phone wait for my poops and vice versa. My bowels are highly unpredictable, and therefore have to "go with the flow". I do try to be discreet, if I am on the phone while pooping. I try not to flush or make any obvoius "poop noises" if at all possible. So far, the methodology has worked.

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In search of the ever evasive BM

I put "seldom, but let nature take its course." My morning poop is well before decent time to make or receive calls, but if I have an afternoon movement and need to use the phone, I bring in the cordless and do both; it happened twice last week, both business calls both nice-sounding young ladies on the other end. During one call I made no noises whatever, but during the other I dropped a couple of softly-plopping turds. Since I was speaking at the time, I doubt she heard a thing.

There's a mute button on our phone, so when the time arises, I can use it. I go while on the phone quite a bit, but that's because I have a few friends with whom I spend alot of time talking. I'm sure they hear the toilet flush, but whatever. We girls go to the bathroom in packs when we're out, why not when we're in?

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.....hugging bunnies since 1969
www.daphneszoo.com

I voted 'other' because I can't really answer the phone at home during a shit, but when I'm at work I have to be available at all times, so the mobile (cell) is always with me.
And my manager has this knack of ringing me just as I'm in the middle of reverse-parking my lunch. The acoustics of the crapper are different to the office, so as soon as I speak, he can tell when he has 'interrupted me' ....again.

I'm afraid the smell will travel through the phone lines.

It does.

Thats why phone lines sag.

Imagine one of those conference calls, with 4 or 5 people sitting on the pan - it would be like the farting scene from Blazing Saddles.

Happens all the time here at the farm. If you call me you will often hear the splash of a chocolate marble or the whoosh of a high-drop piss stream. (Hazard of peeing standing.) And most every call may hear a flushing toilet.

Then again, I'm also the bastard who tells my family and friends to "wait a minute" and then farts into the mouthpiece. So why would I be shy about the bathroom on the phone?

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Born right the first time.

"and then farts into the mouthpiece."
Eww, I don't know if I'd want to put my mouth that close to a fresh fart.

I put never, but that's because I never use the phone. I think last month I used it for about 7 minutes. My greatest bliss is when my cell is out of batteries for a week... and I don't have a home phone.

If I happen to be on the can or headed that way and the phone rings, I know what is more important. The poop will not be denied! That's the nice thing about modern cell phones: automatic voicemail after five rings. I also recognize that I would much rather poop than talk to whoever is on the line. I derive so much more personal satisfaction from a healthy solid log or even a drizzle of diarrhea than gabbing on the phone to someone who will likely forget what you said within a few minutes. All that long phone calls do for me is make my ear itch. If it's important, relevant, interesting or humorous, I'll get back to you.

I never leave the phone in the bathroom, so hearing the joyful sounds of log-dropping just doesn't happen. Also, I have ended calls early with the convenient conversation-killer: "Well, that's interesting; I think I'll go try for a poop now, Bye [click]"

You will know where my priorities lie if you happen to call when my poop is likely to be due, such as twenty minutes after I wake up.
----Captain Craptastic!!!

I went with other as i more than have a tendency to ring people just to tell them that i am currently in the middle of splashin' my arse cheeks with the moist brown water :D
Either that or i will ring them to say that im about to, so they know what im up to if they do feel like ringin'.

More than once have i had a conversation with my mate while either him or me are on the toilet and we have been in the same room...they are always fun stories to tell people as it worries them

ste:)xxx

well i will pick the phone up if its some one that i know and thay know how much i crap and all of that but most the time i dont even pick it up tho

I chose the second one. I assume this poll means phone calls you receive while you're on the crapper. I'd be more interested in who makes phone calls while on the crapper.

I have--though rarely--made phone calls while seated on the pot. Even more rarely, I have made audible noises. I doubt anyone has heard. I do remember a conversation back in college with a girl I was trying to date, and she made it obvious she was in the bathroom at the time, presumably pooping; I found that quite interesting. If I am at home and the need for a b.m. arrives at a time I want to use the phone, I just get the cordless and do both. Not a problem.

Eoz, haven't you ever dutch-ovened yourself? I thought we all did this.

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Born right the first time.

Aint no shame in it, but I'm sure most people don't know I'm dropin a deuce while I'm talkin to them. I try to not make it obvious, Certain people I do. Depends who I'm talkin to.

I doo it all while pooping....ipod, laptop, cellphone....whatever it takes to get me through the moment

my favorite is shitting at work and reading poopreport on my phone...if I'm having trouble making a deposit that morning, seems like reading about poop makes things start to churn

signing off....

Droppin a duce releases some kind of energy that makes me think better. Conversations flow better and make more sense.

I chose frequently and shameless at that. Besides I have a toddler and a preschooler, I'm used to an audience. unfortunatly I haven't gone to the can by myself in 4 years. They always manage to find me.
And on top of that, anyone who calls is usually looking for one of them marathon phone calls where 3 hours later you can't feel your ear, what am I supposed to do put them on hold?

"Excuse me, I'm gonna set the phone down for anywhere between 5 and 20 minutes" Like they aren't gonna know what I'm doing anyways.

I chose frequently and shameless at that. Besides I have a toddler and a preschooler, I'm used to an audience. unfortunatly I haven't gone to the can by myself in 4 years. They always manage to find me.
And on top of that, anyone who calls is usually looking for one of them marathon phone calls where 3 hours later you can't feel your ear, what am I supposed to do put them on hold?

"Excuse me, I'm gonna set the phone down for anywhere between 5 and 20 minutes" Like they aren't gonna know what I'm doing anyways.

seldom + explaining if caught

I hold it in until concentrating on the speaker is no longer possible. The same can be said of talking to house guests. If someone is visiting and the conversation is really animated I will continue to converse from the john.

I recently had an experience with my sister where she paused and told me to listen very carefully. Suddenly this huge, bubbly fart erupted from the earpiece, followed closely by her wicked laughter. Our family is very open about using the bathroom while on the phone.

On the upside in this story, she put the phone back to her mouth too early and ended up with a mouthful of putrid butt wind. Now who's laughing!

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Born right the first time.

I checked 'other'
Having that wonderful modern invention, the cordless phone, allows one to wander around the mansion, pooping whenever one comes across a bathroom, yet at the same time, remaining in-touch with the outside world.

I'm sorry, butt if ones rear end has something to say, let it get on with it!

If ones acquaintance calls during the conversation with the porcelain, (poopus interruptus) then they will be party to any audible output.

I feel the poll is, however well constructed, unnecessary, as there should be no question to answer.
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Did I just fart?.... hope so!

I call people when I'm the crapper, why not? I'm just sitting there, might as well do something to kill time. Of course I don't tell them that's what I'm up to...

A couple of days ago, at home, I needed to make some phone calls, but I felt the need of a poop coming on, so I took the cordless, dialed my first call, sat on the pot, and pooped. The plops were not loud and did not carry over the conversation. No problem. I did lay the phone down between calls to wipe.

Today I came home and called a government office that has been dilatory with some paperwork that I very much need. I talked with a very nice lady who said that the person I really needed to talk to would call me as soon as possible. Not knowing when that would be, and feeling a b.m. coming on, I took the cordless, set it on the sink, sat on the pot, and pooped (thank goodness, not the diarrhea that I have had the last few days, though still pretty soft). I took the first set of toilet paper, folded it, and applied it to the relevant spot. RING! Not wanting to miss that call, I stuck the t.p. where it was and answered the phone. It was a good conversation, though one that necessitated my making another phone call, which I did immediately, still seated, still with t.p. stuck in place. Neither person on the other end had any idea where I was or what I had just done. However, if I had not had that cordless phone right there, I certainly would have missed that call--and getting hold of that office at all is no joke, I assure you. So once again, poop time and phone time coincided, with no problem for either operation.

I find nothing wrong with being on the toilet and on the phone simultaneously (see my first poop story titled "Shitteracy In America")... I don't answer the phone when I'm urinating because I need both hands for that.

I think Gene Simmons once said in an interview that when he takes a shit he has a phone and a pad & pencil ready in case "something happens", like an idea for something. I think of that when I'm on the toilet and the phone.

JPS, I'm sure you've seen (or maybe not, I dunno)rolls of TP with crosswords printed on them. I always make sure that I've a stock in, it helps exercise the grey matter while exorcising the brown matter.
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Did I just fart?.... Oh shit! NO!!

Now for myself I do NOT make calls whilst on the crapper. If the phone is NOT nearby I do not answer it that is the beauty of answering machines and voice mail. I know who called and have the option of calling them back. Warning however if you continue to talk to me when an outgoing dump is impending I will NOT repeat WILL NOT end the phone call. So if you hear a blast from my ass as I always say its JUST ME CLEARING MY THROAT AHHHHHHHHEMMMMMMMM!
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The Thunderous Crapper 63 Enjoying home toilet advantage since 2004!