One day Smerle, the heftiest of the mules, decided to raid an underwear drawer and take quite a bit of something that didn't belong to her. That was THE STRAW.
Gary (Leasee of the apartment) asked his friends to aid him in removing the belongings of the offending parties to the parking lot. We gladly obliged.
That evening, while we were heavily involved in a game of "Ultimate Mortal Kombat" the phone rings...
...it turns out that "Micky Gillis", what ever the fuck her name was, tells Gary that they have moved into a very nice duplex, and would like to invite all of us to the house warming party. Gary hits the pause button and says, "Those bitches are getting such an upper-decker." He continues to play.
I thought to myself for awhile, and then gave in to curiosity, "What's an upper-decker?"
Gary says, "Do you want to do it?"
So, after some discussion, I agree to deliver the upper-decker at the house warming party.
7:00 P.M.
We arrive at the Flabbersons' party.
7:10 P.M.
Threaten the geek on the keg to fill my ridiculously over-sized mug.
7:30 P.M.
Check out the positions of the two restrooms.
7:35 P.M.
Decide on the living room location and polish off the gigantic beer.
7:45 P.M.
Walk into the restroom, push in the thumb-bolt on the door. Check to see that the
toilet is securely fastened to the floor. Wiggle the tank, check for wobble.
7:47 P.M.
Standing steadily on the closed lid, I drop trou, and steady myself on the tank.
Quickly, I release the bag of Crystals' cheese burgers and chilly-cheese fries in the
tank.
7:50 P.M.
Wipe, throw it in the trash (don't want to flush!), replace the cover. Wash hands.
7:52 P.M.
Walk back into the populated area and give Gary the sign (double-fingered-point, like
Isaac the Bartender from "The Love Boat").
-- Txscatlbear