Dear Poopreport,

One subject I don't ever recall seeing on PoopReport is usage of and/or any comments on paper toilet seat covers.

I have never used one. We have them where I work, but I never knew of anyone using them... until today.

Here it is, 4:30 on a Friday afternoon. The office is dead, and my Shameful ass needs to shit. Normally I would wait it out for the next 60 to 90 minutes to take my dump at home, but since most everyone in the office is getting a head start on happy hour, I figured I'd treat my sphincter to an early shit.

I head to my favorite stall, the handicrapper. What do I see? The toilet seat lined with a paper toilet seat cover!! Whoever put this seat cover down took their shit and walked away without disposing of it -- runing my mission!

This arrogant jerk was so paranoid about sitting on a dirty toilet seat, but didn't give a rat's ass that the next user had to touch his used ass paper.

What is the proper protocol with paper seat covers? Who uses them? Do they work? Don't they slip all over the place -- completely defeating the purpose?