I used to work at a woman's clothing store called "Susie's Deals." I was a regular sales clerk with the worst customers living. We constantly had to deal with everyone's drama on a daily basis.

The biggest problem people had with our establishment was that there were no public bathrooms. One brisk morning, I dragged my hung-over ass to work. Everything was going as it always did.

While one of the girls I worked with and I unloaded a shipment box, we discovered this horrible smell. We let our eyes wander about, trying to find the source of this stench. Lo and behold, there was a child with shit all over the back of his legs, tracking it all over the store.

The more we looked around the shop, the more we would find these shit-ridden foot prints. We were outraged. There was no way in hell that any of us were going to pick up that kid's shit. I'm sorry, that was not on the application.

We found the child's Mother and tried to explain to her that her kid had shit all over himself and the store, and that we were not going to clean it up. She spoke no English, so we had to resort to visual signals to get our point across.