I love this world and all its people
'Neath dome of mosque or chapel's steeple
Hebrew, Buddhist, Pagan, B'hai, Hindu
And atheists -- I put my faith in you

So on this day of global unity
I gave my bowels total impunity
This is not a test -- it's a just cause
To "release the hounds," not hems and haws

So after several trips -- just pees
I seized the pose -- I grabbed my knees
It was my last chance to poop for peace
I would mediate a vast release!

I dreamed of what my will would yield
Enough peace support to grow a field
All my hopes manifest in a steaming pile
It would back up drains for half a mile!

So I rallied my guts and gave the order
But there were no troops to approach that border...
I twisted, writhed, almost contorted
I held my breath and almost snorted

I'd eaten beans, I'd scoffed some bran
But none of those would hit the fan
I considered an Ex-Lax investure
But preferred to make an honest gesture

So there I sat, and there I squatted
As I struggled to get my guts unknotted
To move forward and advance that dream
Of peace support out of my seam

And then I felt within me movement
For peace I would show my approvement
Though the rabbit has the faster pace
It was that turtle did win the race...

I called forth the turtle to emerge
And put forth one enormous purge
I shook and squeezed and worked my ass
In hopes that damned turtle would pass

But what came out -- I'm ashamed to say --
Was not solid on this blessed day
For on this day of global release
My body chose to blow off peace!

Though the thought of peace is near my heart
Mighty Casey could only strike out a fart
So I'm sorry I couldn't support your cause
The means was not within my drawers...

And though this story's all untrue
I hope it brought a smile to you
On Earth, we're tenants with a short lease
So we all HAVE to give a shit for peace