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Piss Report or Fart Report?

Postby Deja Poo on Jun 06 2016 6:37 pm

I can't tell, but I'm going with Piss Report. It's difficult to say because it involves both. Simultaneously. More or less.

The other day at work, I had to take a roaring piss. I had 20 oz glass of water with breakfast and, lo and behold, an hour later, I needed to pee. Of course, like any good bodily function story, I kept gFetting distracted by trivial matters so that I couldn't get to company piss pot. Finally, a half-hour later, with an aching bladder, I was able to get to the Men's Room.

I have to admit that this 4-holer has exceptional acoustics. While I was unlimbering the timber, I felt the urge to pass some gas. Seeing as how farting while pissing at the urinal is almost a given, and since there was nobody there but me, I decided to go loud and proud. So, I let fly right after I started pissing. And what I thought was going to be a reverberating bomb turned out to be a long, slow rumble. And that rumble went on.

and on.

and on.

And even when I finished pissing (what seemed to be a full minute later), that fart was still blasting away. For fear of disrupting a fart of such epic magnitude, I just stood there letting fly. That concerto seemed to go on for another 30 seconds until it had finally come to its sputtering epilogue.

Once the ass music has ended, I was struck by a kind of sadness that it had to come to an end. I put away my junk, washed my hands and strolled back to my desk, feeling quite smug that I had performed a feat of true beauty.
I came. I saw. I farted.
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Re: Piss Report or Fart Report?

Postby ChiefThunderbutt on Jun 06 2016 6:47 pm

This brought tears to my eyes, I have had similar experiences that not only made my chest swell with pride but also brought stains to my boxers that caused my laundress to glare at me in disgust.
If I had two faces do you think
I'd be wearing this one?
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