[daphne]

wrote in the itchy ass crack Poonurse thread....

So, I am not a weird freak or anything...but my problem is not the pooh..it is the bum. I wake up in the middle of the night say....between 12-6 in the morning, and my bum hurts...like crazy. I actuallty have to shit on the shitter and push. I feel like i am leaving a load, but nothing is there, clean wipe too. It is a sharp pain, enough to wake me up and i am a deep sleeper. I thought is syncronized with something (menstruation, ovulation.....) nothing, but it happens at least once a month. I have gone to the point of writing it on my calendar, but it is not exact. If anyone know what this is, or experirenced, or know anything, please help. I cant take the pain anymore, and where i live there are no doctors available to see me, I would have to go the ER and wait a life time, and it happends and leaves so quick, i would look dumb trying to show them....thanks

I think this is something I've experienced. Have we ever addressed the "ghost owie pains" that will sometimes occur in your butt? I get "butt cramps" from time to time, a sharp, quick pain in the butt, and it's the most difficult thing to explain. Anyone else?[/i]

[The Dumpster]

I dunno about this, Daph, but congratulations on your 3400th forum post earlier tonight. Dumpster is trying to organize a party in your honor.

Please come and join us before the cops break it up!

[Turdle Dove]

I get that weird sharp butt pain! And it makes you straighten your back all quick, too. I poke my butt once or twice and then it seems to go away. You just have to keep your ass in line, you know?

[sphincter cramp]

This phenomenon is what I call a sphincter cramp (hence my screen name). It is a disabling pain that I sometimes get. I don't know what causes it, but sometimes it takes a while to get rid of.

[daphne]

Are you two female or male? I'm wondering if it is related to being female. By the way, I love the post about keeping your ass in line. This is funny.

[sphincter cramp]

Female

[daphne]

Aha. The plot thickens. Any dudes out there who will own up to a butt cramp so I can lay this to rest in my mind?

[BookerT]

I get that-like a "charlie-horse" in your rectum, and quite painful. I actually heard this is normal. It didn't happen to me for the first time until I was about 31 and scared me pretty bad. I finally asked the dr after 5-6 times and he told me not to worry unless it got more frequent (now about once every 2 months and usually only lasts 15 minutes). Almost every time it wakes me up in the middle of the night. It has only happened once when it didnt wake me up. Just butt muscle spasms. I am still curious why it never happened to me before the age of 31 and now happens about 6 times a year ever since!!!!

[daphne]

A butt Charlie Horse makes all the sense in the world as to what it is.

AB2K, can we poll this, or have you already done so?

[Mott The Poople]

YES once in while (coupla times a year) I get them too....
They really suck....(meaning I pucker)
OK PR MEN....I broke the ice
Am I alone.... ????

BTW
AB2K will have a field day with this.....

[Bilgepump]

Happens alot, to me, but upon further inspection, its only because I somehow got a Weed Whacker stuck up my ass in the middle of the night.

[Poop Shooter]

Happens alot, to me, but upon further inspection, its only because I somehow got a Weed Whacker stuck up my ass in the middle of the night.

I had that problem once too. Only mine was a rototiller. Damn gardening accidents.


serious note, never had an actual pain in the ass, just many figurative ones. unless your counting a tough shit, but I believe your speaking of a "Ghost Ass Pain" or a GAP for short.

[GottaGoGirl]

So THAT's where the Garden Weasel got to!

[Lahey's_shit_hawk]

If it's what I think it is, I get it once in a while. But thankfully it goes away in about 5 to 10 minutes.

For the record i'm a female...if were still keeping score.

[Coprologist]

I get sphincter cramp about once or twice a year in the night. I have to get out of bed and sit on the pot. Sometimes I actually crap, and often that makes it go away, but sometimes I can't push anything out. But it wears off after a few minutes usually.