Had to go "other".
"Whole lotta Rosie" works best for me.
_______ The proper order is kiss me, then go smell the other dog or cat's butt. I cannot stress this enough.
I also had to go other.....thanks to my high consumption of chilies, Johnny Cash's "Ring of Fire" seems most appropriate.
_______Eat chilies and feel the burn!!
Hell in a bucket.
I wouldn't touch it with a ten foot pole.
When my piles are problematic it's probably Deep Purple's "Burn" or "Fire" by The Crazy World of Arthur Brown.
If it's a sweet-smelling beaut of a dump, then probably "Brown Sugar".
Hmmm...this needs some thought.
I voted for Hard Days Night but then I decided it was probably more like the Beatle's song Help! cause that's what I usually scream when I'm having the horrible cramping shits. Won't you please please help me!_______Earth, insane asylum for the universe.
Anything by Michael Bolton because I like to pretend I'm shitting on his big slop-bucket mop head.
"Free Turd" is a close second as lately my dumps seem to go on and on forever.
How about "Don't Fear the Reaper" by B.O.C.? I've had a few that could kill a person. _______You have the right to remain Silent but Deadly....
Boris the Slider.
I voted for i cant get no satisfaction. Butt, mc hammer. dont touch that would be second._______...And their flesh like dung. Zeph. 1:17
As most of you know I had a touch of a problem with opiates, so for me "Try (just a little bit harder)" resonates best.
P.S. Ello Mooney, you mad fucking beast. Fancy some fun at the Riot house, I'll bring the extra tv?
For me, the waiting is the hardest part.
Tom Petty
"Bohemian Rhapsody" because my shit has been quite operatic of late._______Yo quiero Taco Bell.
"That Smell" by Lynyrd Skynyrd._______i love poop.
I've had occassion to be reminded of "Lawyers, Guns and Money" by Warren Zevon.... "....I'm a desperate man Send lawyers, guns and money The shit has hit the fan"
Brown Eyed Girl. _______To affect the quality of the poo, that is the art of life. ~Thoreau, sort of.
It`s got to be "Big Log" by Robert Plant.
i think this poll is really just an excuse for us to list song titles that sound poop-related._______i love poop.
It's OK for you olid shitters out there: Tull - Thick as a brick Floyd - Brain Damage
For me it's anything by Mud.
Oops! Try Solid!
To really date myself...."Incense and Peppermints" would work as well._______ The proper order is kiss me, then go smell the other dog or cat's butt. I cannot stress this enough.
This song had a very brief reign on the country charts years ago, it describes with accuracy what happens when I drop my load;
Dead Skunk in the Middle of the Road
Artist: Loudon Wainwright
Crossin' the highway late last night He shoulda looked left and he shoulda looked right He didn't see the station wagon car The skunk got squashed and there you are!
You got yer Dead skunk in the middle of the road Dead skunk in the middle of the road You got yer dead skunk in the middle of the road Stinkin' to high Heaven!
Take a whiff on me, that ain't no rose! Roll up yer window and hold yer nose You don't have to look and you don't have to see 'Cause you can feel it in your olfactory
Yeah you got yer dead cat and you got yer dead dog On a moonlight night you got yer dead toad frog Got yer dead rabbit and yer dead raccoon The blood and the guts they're gonna make you swoon! You got yer Dead skunk in the middle of the road Dead skunk in the middle of the road You got yer dead skunk in the middle of the road Stinkin' to high Heaven!
C'mon stink!
You got it! It's dead, it's in the middle Dead skunk in the middle! Dead skunk in the middle of the road Stinkin' to high heaven! All over the road, technicolor man! Oh, you got pollution It's dead, it's in the middle And it's stinkin' to high, high Heaven
I like the Boston song....More than a feeling. In the alternative Peter Frampton...DO YOU. In this instance the song would be re-named Do-Do You.
It's definitely a duet version of Meatloaf's "Bat Out of Hell" for me--
(poop): But I gotta get out (me): I gotta break it out now Before the final (butt)crack of dawn (both): So we gotta make the most of our one night together When its over you know We'll both be so alone
(poop): Like a bat out of hell I'll be gone when the morning comes When the night is over Like a bat out of hell I'll be gone...
Like yesterday after a good poop. The song "you are sooo beautiful"_______...And their flesh like dung. Zeph. 1:17
Taking care of Business. BTO
I picked "no satisfaction".
I don't know what is up with my bowels - I eat and eat and eat but I rarely shit big turds anymore.
I swear I must have 20 pounds of fecal matter in my gut.
I will admit that I don't drink enough water, eat enough fiber, fruit and vegetables.
It's weird...when I was younger my diet was even worse and I shit like a mule. Now that I am in my 40's I guess I need some sort of help.
doniker.....I have had the same problem since I retired, I think that maybe, in my case, it is a lack of exercise. I plan on trying to get more ( who the fuck enjoys exercise) and see if the big turds return.
If you take exercise, and you call it exercise, then it is drudgery. If you call it kayaking, (in my case) then it is fun. All of must have something that is physical, that is enjoyable. (here come all the sex posts)
I don't know Chief.
I am on my feet, at work, most of the day, so I am pretty active.
doniker....I used to give my daughter, a registered nurse, the same argument. I told her that since I stood up and walked back and forth constantly while I was working I didn't need additional exercise. She claimed that my body was adjusted to that as normal and I needed to exercise anyway. She was probably right but who the hell wants to exercise when they are dog tired from a days work?
Squat has it right. Just like work isn't work if you enjoy it, exercise isn't exercise if you are doing something you enjoy. I like bicycle riding and when I'm done, I feel like I worked out yet I enjoyed it while I was doing it. I just might try kayaking. Squat do they make kayaks that are chemical and oil resistant?
A rock band named Static-X has a few songs that would work for this: "Push it" and "Love Dumpling"
I can only recall the lyrics to love dumplung at the moment. "I really love you, love dumplung. You're shit's like chocolate cake. Your sas smells like a rose. Drop down in the line. Really lay me a line"
I have NO idea what that all means. _______Number One . . . I order you to take a number two.
I think Molly Hatchet may be a winner with the song "flirtin with disaster."
PD! The short answer is yes. I build kayaks. Wooden, horribly expensive, floating works of art. Some people, afraid of scratching the bottom, will spray it (just the bottom!) with Line-X. The pick-up bed liner. That stuff will resist anything. If you sprayed a kayak (NOT one of mine!) all over... You should be able to paddle in a vat of sulfuric acid. I doubt the wildlife viewing would be very interesting however.
Oh but it is Squat. The beauty of a tumor ridden mangy Norwegian rat splashing through a rainbow hued tank farm runoff stream will take your breath away. And possibly your health.
Turds of Dreams. If you exercise the big turds will come...._______Earth, insane asylum for the universe.
Yea "push it" by static-x
prarie doggin said "...The beauty of a tumor ridden mangy Norwegian rat splashing through a rainbow hued tank farm runoff stream will take your breath away."
Is it just me or does that make everyone hungry??
I dunno Chief, but I hear "Coom by yah" in the background... _______To affect the quality of the poo, that is the art of life. ~Thoreau, sort of.
It's just you, Chief. PD's wilderness experience gave me a fright rather than hunger pangs._______...And their flesh like dung. Zeph. 1:17
"We gotta get out of this place" The Animals
Thriller! Because I get to brag on a big turd that Chief had delivered to me, so I can call it mine._______...And their flesh like dung. Zeph. 1:17
I sure hope you enjoy that gift from Chief there SP. Damn UPS not only charged us for over size, but over weight and over stank as well. They claimed we did some damage to the springs on their delivery truck.
PD, this is why you should use the Postal Service when shipping turds. We don't care how big it is or how nasty it is, we'll ship it.
UPS? I feel somewhat betrayed.
Posty, I will send you some bran muffins in consolation. I'm so sory some poop reporters are so uncaring. I will send them Fed Ex to get them there quickest. _______To affect the quality of the poo, that is the art of life. ~Thoreau, sort of.
Chief, you brought back memories! Back in the day's of my mother's single life (after Dad left for a few years), she hung out at the science fiction club at Sonoma State University, where she discovered several fellow warped minds. They often sang the dead skunk song and laughed maniacally one day when the song started playing as they passed a flattened skunk on the road.
And people wonder why I'm weird. _______I found Jesus! He was behind the sofa the whole time!
TSV.....I think I am a little warped perhaps because I don't find the smell of skunks that unpleasant. If you are very close when they first spray the smell is somewhat overpowering but if they are off in the distance or were flattened the day before the smell is not that bad. In my opinion gasoline fumes, ammonia, paint thinner, etc., are much more unpleasant.
br>_______Eat chilies and feel the burn!!
Postman, I did try the US Postal service first, but they said they would not come out in the gloom of night to pick up Chief's grogan. Beside, Sittingpretty said her UPS guy was hot, and what better way to meet a hot guy than while he is bringing you a fresh warm turd.
I voted for other. My poop themed song is "Billy was a Mountain" by Frank Zappa. Been having some MASSIVE turds lately, feels like I am passing a significant portion of the Earth's crust, heavy as iron and stone. SPLASH!!!
In a side note, I passed a delightfully loud two-part fart on the toilet this morning, sounded like "WHUUUUUHNGK, Vorp!" Imagine that sound reverberated by porcelain and water and you get the idea! Another three pound turd soon followed to delight of all parties involved.
Another two-flusher comin' right up!
----Captain Craptastic!!!
PD, I am enjoying my giant turd immensely. I have it parked just inside my property line on the side that the mean neighbors live on. The sign next to it says Do Not Disturb!_______...And their flesh like dung. Zeph. 1:17
Chief, do you have another big turd to share with me. I need it so Postman can deliver it. PD, you don't have to rush the next big grunter. So can you let Posty deliver it so his feelings won't get hurt again. Please._______...And their flesh like dung. Zeph. 1:17
"Do Da Run Run" By the Ronettes
Shook me all night long
Imagine. By John Lennon. Because I haven't gone yet!!!_______...And their flesh like dung. Zeph. 1:17
This is classical rather than classic rock, but after a round of chili and beer I make sounds that resemble the finale of Tchaikovsky's 1812 Overture.
I recently ate some Quaker Steak and Lube wings called something like "Screamin' Anus" or something. The next morning my song was the old Killer Jerry Lee Lewis version of Great Balls of Fire._______Look out for Number 1, but don't step in Number2
"Girl Afraid" by The Smiths cause I'm never really sure what's coming out of there and it's rarely pleasant.
Not really a classic, though, is it? On that note then, "I Love That Dirty Water" by The Standells. Because I really do love that dirty water, it means the dirty pooping deed is over. And, well, Boston your my home.
Several songs by Muddy Waters come to mind, FUNKY BUTT and LITTLE BROWN BIRD lead the list but he has many more appropriate titles.
Buddy guy.....feels like rain.
"I Can't Get No Satisfaction" even after 2 bottles of mg citrate._______...And their flesh like dung. Zeph. 1:17
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