i chose other! i told the story in the forums not too long ago. this evil spider tried to attack me whilst i was on the toilet, and i had to jump up in order to avoid and, subsequently, vanquish the spider.
_______
i love poop.

I chose other as well...usually because the cat got out...leaving me wipeless.

_______

The proper order is kiss me, then go smell the other dog or cat's butt. I cannot stress this enough.

Nothing more unusual than the phone that I can remember however, I had a friend when I was a teen who was taking a dump behind the barn when a chicken interrupted him by pecking a dangling piece of corn from his butthole.

_______
Eat chilies and feel the burn!!

I voted other because there is no interupting my poop. Once my butt hits the seat, I'm blowing it out. There is no stopping me now!
_______
...And their flesh like dung. Zeph. 1:17

I voted other. I was working at night at my office, and I had to go. I must have sat too long on the toilet, because the light/fan timer expired and I was left in the dark. It was pitch black, and I had to waddle out of the stall and open the hallway door to reset the timer. Luckily no one was walking into the bathroom at the same time.

I voted other. One time I was working in my office at night and I had to go. I must have sat on the toilet too long, as the light/fan timer expired leaving me in pitch blackness. I had to waddle out of the stall and open the hallway door to reset the timer. Luckily no one had chosen to walk into the bathroom at the same time.

Other: I was camping and some kid decided to toss a water balloon into my latrine stall. The paper was soaked. I finished, wiped and pulled my shorts up. All the while, Doofus is still laughing outside. When the door opened, all he could say is "Oh Shit, Sir. I thought you were someone else." I glared at him while I washed my hands, and then asked him to lead me to his parents.
Ever been grounded to a campsite when all of your buddies are swimming? Now imagine that site being about 75 feet from the water, and all of your buddies know you're in trouble.
I didn't crack a smile until I was walking away, hearing their laughter.
_______
You have the right to remain Silent but Deadly....

The building was on fire and as I was evacuating, I had to be evacuated.

a wanking baboon

http://www.poopreport.com/Travel/ethiopian_defecation.html

About a week ago my wife was coughing a lot at night and decided to move to another room to minimize the noise. The alarm clock is in our room, and when I got up, I forgot to turn it off. I went to the computer room. After a bit, I felt the urge, went to the little bathroom off our room, and sat down to unload. It was a good movement, coming out slowly, when the alarm went off. Since my wife had only recently gotten back to sleep, I surely didn't want to wake her with the alarm; so I squeezed off the TIP (turd in progress), hobbled over (pants still down) to cut off the alarm, and hobbled back to finish my crappus interruptus, which still had a couple of turds to go. That episode was what prompted me to submit this poll.

I voted for the "family member emergency" because at one stage, it seemed that every time I'd sit down and get comfortable, I'd just begin to grow a tail and someone would need to use the toilet (and their need was always greater than mine).
_______
The white zone is for loading and unloading only- FZ.

It's always the damned doorbell. And of course it's always the bathroom that has the door directly across from the window on my front porch. And of course I never shut the door because the kids have to come in 50 times and ask me things. Our new favorite thing to ask is from the 2 year old, "Hey Maaaaaaaa you pooping?""Hey Maaaaaaa you a farter."
_______
Earth, insane asylum for the universe.

When I was a boy my Dad and I lived in a third floor apartment, and our bathroom window (right next to the toilet) was directly above the front door to the building. It greatly minimized the interruption being able to stick my head out the window and shout "I'll be right there, I'm taking a shit!"
_______
Every poop is not to be told to every body.

I'm sure that arrangement also came in handy when there was an annoying salesman at the door.

Now that you mention it, it was definitely a great way to avoid answering the door as well.
_______
Every poop is not to be told to every body.

I am forever getting interrupted by the Papoopse. Whenever I go into the bathroom, he has to go to the bathroom as well. He's developed this habit of wanting to pee while I'm peeing. It's his new Daddy-Papoopse bonding thing. It doesn't matter when the last time was that he's pissed either. Even if it's 5 minutes earlier, if I'm in the bathroom, he's in there as well wanting to join in the party in the American Standard Cimmaron.

However, he assumes that every time I go into the bathroom that I'm going to pee. I never lock the door either, although I usually close it. So, I'll be setting there with my pants down around my ankles and he'll come barging in. Of course, there's no "Oops." and then heading out of the room. Nope, he drops his pants and looks at me like "Move over, Dad. I gotta pee." He's gotten over being hurt when I don't immediately get up. I usually tell him that he'll just have to wait, that Daddy is pooping. As long as he gets to flush, he's happy.
_______
Yo quiero Taco Bell.

How about "All of the above"? (except maybe the calamity outside the bathroom window)

I've had crappus interruptus via doorbell, by phone, by alarm clock, by kid rushing in, and by vomiting (so fun when it's coming out BOTH ends!)

If I'da been on the toilet instead of sitting at the computer when my asshole neighbor crashed his car into my fence, then it would truly have been All Of The Above.

Missed it by that much!

_______
How I beat IBS

Oh yeah, and my office building is like PD's... I've been "crappus leftus inthe darkus" many, many times in my 12 year tenure in this building.

And then there also was that one time...

_______
How I beat IBS

i was walking along one day on my uncles farm when i felt something slippy and slidey in my panties. it felt nice. it was moisturising my botty. i thought 'ooooooh! nice!'
so i walked to the pig sty and let them look at the poop that had escaped my botty hole. they said 'ooooohh! nice!'
and then.. MY UNCLE WALKED IN!
i was like 'OH NO!'
and he goes 'oh my. you stole my trend!'
so i sighed 'look at my poopy uncle!'
and he has always respected me from then onwards coz he liked my poople.

i was doing my poo when the dorrbell rang, i got up to answer it but forgot i hadn't quite finished...when i answered the door, the postman was delivering a parcel, when i got a little parcel for myself too. I pooed my pants...oops, the postman looked at me as i groaned and i shut the door. I wiped and then did a machine gun turd. YUM.

AC, I took your above 2 posts, and through a complicated process of triangulation and decyphering, I have narrowed down your location to a 10 mile radius of Bumfuk West Virginia. Am I close?

The doorbell and phone have happened mid-poop a number of times during the number two. That's why there's voice mail, since the poop ALWAYS takes precedence! The world can wait for five minutes while I pinch a loaf.

I voted for other since I now have a new kitten that likes to join me in the bathroom. You know how curious and inquisitive kittens are. She even jumped up on my lap a couple times right as the colon beast was appearing. Doesn't interrupt me per se, I keep on pooping. Just a humorous interlude.

The other day, the Atrocity of Diarrhea made an appearance. The sound of large amounts of liquid shits spraying out of my ass at a high rate of pressure and speed was quite entertaining for both me and the kitten.

By the way, the kitten eats dry food, so her little poops are solid and easy to grab, just in case I want to toss one over to the neighbor's dog for a snack. "Here boy, gritty tootsie roll kitten turd comin' at ya'!MMMM, Good!" The kitten poops twice a day, just like me, that's a good girl!

----Captain Craptastic!!!

I should point out that I was not the postman mentioned in AC's comment above, thank God.

So that was you, Anonymous Coward. I just want you to know that I was so inspired by your free-spirit, by your utterly shameless shitting that I had to tell your neighbor's all about your turdage while I was dropping off their mail.

Interestingly enough, most of them said, "Hmmm. Not surprising." or some such variation.

Hey, watch who you're insulting there, Chitlins. Our coop smells better than AC's nasty shit-encrusted cooter any day of the week. In fact, our coop smells better than AC after a bath. Heck, the whole barnyard smells better than either AC or her Uncle.

As for the noise, bacon boy, the ruckus that those two was raising was above and beyond the row that you and the sow raise.

If anybody should be sent to the slaughterhouse, it should be those two. If you can't do that, then at least castrate the Uncle instead of the pigs. The pigs serve a purpose in this life. As for the Uncle, well, that's questionable.

I remember that incident. That was some nasty booty she was showing off. It was all covered in poop and smelled like the inside of the chicken coop.

Then when her Uncle came in and saw that messy package, he became so excited that he mounted her right then and there. You should have seen and heard them. They were, well, squealing like pigs.

That was just so wrong. I swear it made even me feel unclean. It should be illegal to breed hillbillies. If you've got to castrate anybody, you should castrate the Uncle instead of us pigs.

One of my now outside cats sprayed my leg while I was on the toilet.

Two words. Airline turbulence.

So squat were you and your poo sent airborne?
_______
Earth, insane asylum for the universe.

Mmmmm, turbulence, airborne shit? Sounds familiar.

When I was younger, I had my own bathroom downstairs, so I often shut the door only partially or left it open if no one was home. My sweet and loving doggy (may she rest in peace) would occasionally nudge open the door when I was on the pot and amble in, tail wagging and a doggy smile on her face. When she was happy, she used to sneeze a lot, so she would come right up and sneeze repeatedly into my lap while I was trying to poop. Not necessarily an interruption, but certainly distracting. Plus, I not only had to wipe my ass, I also had to wipe the dog snot off my legs.

_______
http://www.shybowel.com/

PD's story was so frighteningly familiar, that it was almost not funny. I do so hate flying. Give me a sailboat in a hurricane over a plane anytime.

Ever since I read an article in Hustler about trying to join the mile high club and experiencing turbulence the whole thought of someone being airborn in the toilet makes me giggle.
_______
Earth, insane asylum for the universe.

Trampolines are more fun anyway.

_______
How I beat IBS

Depends on how you use them I guess.
_______
Earth, insane asylum for the universe.

MMC, no one reads Hustler for the articles, silly. Second, you've actually looked at a Hustler? Lady Dodger won't even touch my copies of High Society, Swank, and Juggs except to throw them in the garbage...

I learned to cope with these interruptions when a teenager. I left home for school after my parents had gone to work, and one of my duties was to pay the milkman on Fridays. He could never be sure of his exact timing, and sometimes he arrived when my trousers were round my ankles. If the operation in question hadn't begun, it was OK, and I 'did myself up' and went to the door. But there were times when this wasn't possible, and I would shove some paper up the relevant part of my anatomy, and waddle to the door with my trousers half way up. I was confident enough as a person not to be over-fastidious, and I he knew me well enough to know what I was doing.

Likewise, when our group of friends called for each other on the way to school on weekdays, or church on Sunday mornings, one of us might be in the same 'predicament'. You learned to be respectable but not over-fastidious.

Sometimes there is a telephone call or knock on the door at an awkward time. Nuisance callers at the door, or canvassers for some right-wing religious sect, can be embarrassed if you appear at the door with the belt on your trousers undone, and you say something like 'I was on the toilet' or 'I was wiping my bottom'.

My boss at work sometimes rings me when I am occupied in this way, and I have my cordless or mobile phone with me. At least, he knows I am using my own toilet paper, and not the firm's!

I chose *other* also. Once lived in San Francisco. Nothing to disturb your constipation, I mean, *concentration* like being more than one floor above ground when an earthquake hits.

I hate it when my 2 grandkids,dog and boyfriend all have to follow me to the toilet when I have to "go".I can't get any privacy.

Correction Dodge MEN don't read Hustler for the articles. I've read a bunch of Hustlers, Playboys and the like. Alot of them have some great raunchy comics in them, especially Hustler.How could she throw them away?! The horror!
While there are some "interesting" photos there is also alot of humor in them. I urge more women to take a look see. You might be surprised.
_______
Earth, insane asylum for the universe.

my first trip to a porn shop, i didn't know what to get but i just HAD to buy something. so i got a three pack of Hustlers. at least, i thought they were all Hustlers. they snuck a Fiesta in the middle to make it look like a better deal than it was!

i read the articles.
_______
i love poop.

Damn, wonderpance, I'm jealous. In the little hick town I live in there are no decent porn shops. Next time you go, pick me up some Hustlers, will ya?

Postman, you deliver the magazines don't you? You surely take a peek.
I'd be leery about the 3 packs Wonder. They might just sneak a man porn magazine in the middle.

I got interrupted once when my jumprope broke.
_______

The proper order is kiss me, then go smell the other dog or cat's butt. I cannot stress this enough.

I picked other because it's usually some kind of combo between the kids and something else. Imagine your poop getting interrupted because of someone else's poop. While I was in the toilet my 23 month old hollered, "mommy, I shoo-shoo," needless to say she had a trail of diarrhea on the floor. Then my 4 and 6 year old came to tell on each other about something while my 2 month old was crying to be fed and the doorbell rang while the phone was ringing...phew! I am interrupted just thinking about that!

Postman, this was actually big ass porn shop in Seattle, where i was visiting a friend. it was a site to behold!

prarie, don't worry. i only bought those because i wanted to buy something and couldn't afford any ummm....anything else. but i wouldn't buy porn again. there's a veritable cornucopia of free porn online!

people who pay for porn are suckers.
_______
i love poop.

I've never heard of a porn shop that just has big ass porn, but I guess if it has to be anywhere, Seattle would be a good place. Maybe you can PM the Chief with the location. He likes the big ass women.

Dammit all, our porn shops only have weird ass porn. Sigh. It's always something!
_______
Earth, insane asylum for the universe.

PD, those of us in the Postal Service can't drool over those magazines anymore, because they all come plastic wrapped. Even Easyrider comes wrapped now, which is a real shame. All those biker chicks seem to love showing their tits for the camera.

I chose other,a few years ago we had adopted some wild mustangs,one day in the process of breaking them to ride one of our hands was inside the barn arena with one that got away from him, I happened to be in the can at the time.The horse ran down the wrong alleyway in the barn discovered it couldn't get out and started kicking wildly and just so happened to kick in the bathroom door while i was sitting on the throne,(that bathroom is not a really big one sink and toilet only), door swung (shattered)open in the process and happened to catch my arm and slam it against the wall, and break my wrist.I had no trouble shitting at that point.We no longer mess with mustangs.

Wow! That's quite a unique interruption. That could be front page material!
_______
Every poop is not to be told to every body.

loaf.....I hope it wasn't the wrist on your ass wiping hand.

_______
Eat chilies and feel the burn!!

LOL! You know, the first thing that popped into my mind was "How did you wipe?", then I read the next two well placed lines:
I had no trouble shitting at that point.We no longer mess with mustangs.
I was instantly distracted by that vivid description of how loaf felt about the shituation.
_______
Every poop is not to be told to every body.

Chief thankfully it was not,to tell you the truth I am not even sure I wiped or that I even needed to everything came out so fast I think I had a clean poop.
Poot,Trust me at that time the only things that were going through my mind were,Why did this happen,was my trainer ok,was the horse ok,AND I WILL NEVER LET MY WIFE TALK ME INTO ADOPTING MUSTANGS AGAIN!!

On three separate occasions I've had the fire alarm go off whilst shitting. I swear it had nothing to do with me!

_______
Rock-n-roll! Poopy-poo!

Yes, my pooping sessions have also been "timed out" by the timer on the lights and fan in a few of the ladies restrooms at work. Now, when I know it's going to run longer than 7 minutes, I stick tape over the sensor. And in one of the restrooms I managed to tamper with the timer and advanced it to 20 minutes! I was a local hero that day!

_______
Rock-n-roll! Poopy-poo!

Thanks to Shitwit, I remembered a time at my school a couple of years back when I was dropping one in the boys' restroom when the fire alarm went off. I quick pushed out the remaining turd, stuffed some tp in my crack, and went out to be counted for the fire drill. After it, there was barely time to go back and finish wiping before the next class.

Everytime I see a rodeo where some dude gets flung off a wild bucking horse I'll think of loaf and his flying shit rocket.
_______
Earth, insane asylum for the universe.

MMC I have been a wild horse and been thrown many times most of time you can see it coming,NOT this time it was all going!

Wow loaf you've really been a wild horse?! Did you pretend you were a magical unicorn and frollic through the flowers?
_______
Earth, insane asylum for the universe.

Sorry that should be (on a) in there, but a magical unicorn frollicing through the flowers and shitting on walmarts wouldn't be to bad a life.

Frollicing through flowers, shitting on Walmarts, and kicking in the teef of douchebags. Ahhhh yeah that would be the life wouldn't it.
_______
Earth, insane asylum for the universe.

Wow I am getting a little exciting thinking about it now there are a hell of alot of walmarts and douchebags though.

Oh yes. I nearly forgot this one! I was in a portacrapper at night during some big outdoor convention. Everyone was getting in their cars to go home. I waited until the last performance before heading to the shithouse. Big mistake! I had to poop so bad I could taste it, and the line was snaked around the house a couple times. It was also right next to the dirt road on the convention grounds and some knuckle-head parked too close to the shitter. I was the lucky one who finally got her turn, just in time for that fuckwit to start up their car, and forget they'd left it in reverse. I could hear them talking to someone outside the car and I could see the backup lights on but the car wasn't moving. I shit as fast as I could b/c I knew what would happen next. I was just finishing up the paperwork when I heard the vroom and watched with horror as the backup lights and break lights draw closer to my poop booth. Just as I flung open the door with my pants barely past my hips, they backed into the shithouse and knocked the fucker over! Everyone screamed in the vicinity of the carnage and I know one woman actually pissed herself (fear? gave up holding it? a little of both?). One guy said to me "well, that was some quick thinking on your part" and I replied "yeah, and some quick shitting too!"

_______
Rock-n-roll! Poopy-poo!

Yeah loaf thats what makes it so exciting. This thought shall be my happy place that I'll go to when I'm on the verge of strangling some douche in Walmart.

Shitwit, shameless much? Glad to see you made it out before you got coated in some toxic shit sludge. And yet you still managed to taste shit. Vaaaaary interesting.
_______
Earth, insane asylum for the universe.

I think I was just out of high school when this happened, and EVERY time I use the portacrapper I remember this event. And yes, I'm totally shameless.

_______
Rock-n-roll! Poopy-poo!

I remember when I was about 10, I was in taking a shit when my mom yelled at me that my pet gerbil got out of his cage. At the time I thought, Fuck him, the cat will get him eventually, but I did leave the bathroom and go out to help catch him.

Other than that, it's just been phone calls, teenage sons wanting something out of the bathroom, people just walking in, not having any idea what a closed bathroom door means. Just your normal, everyday shit.

You're right Postman. When I'm in the bathroom taking a crap, I want to be left alone, and not have to be interrupted. One time I was taking a dump when I heard a knock on the door. I didn't get up to answer the door, and after a few more knocks, there was silence. Unfortunately, my neighbor said they saw Ed McMahon and a tv crew leaving my property. She said she heard Ed muttering, "fuck him, we'll go to the runner up's house then."

If you had answered the door with your pants around your ankles, you not only would have been 10 million dollars richer, but you'd also have been a YouTube sensation.

other. had to move so my wife could puke.

tps, that happened to me once, also, but my wife decided to go to the kitchen sink instead of bothering me. Only thing is, we don't have a garbage disposal, so it was really fun cleaning out the sink.

yeah, that must have been nasty. i don't know why my wife didn't just use the trash can. smelling my shit probably promoted more puking that wasn't necessary.

It always happens that when I get home from work the first thing I do is hit the crapper, and it never fails the males of the house must know at that moment "What's for supper?". Who can think about food while letting it out the other end? Not me. I can't seem to get it through their thick heads to wait until I am done...

I was reluctant to share this, but since so many of you have shared funny experiences (pooping scholar), I decided to share mine.

I voted other. I had to get off the toilet because Mr. daphne had to go once, only he didn't make it.

We were on our way out to dinner, and we only had one toilet in Fort Knox. I was on the pot, and I heard Mr. daphne telling me that he had to go. I said to him, "Dude, there's no stopping this train."

Well, apparently, his own train was also unstoppable, and it ran off the tracks and into his underwear. As soon as I got off the pot, I opened the bathroom door to see him on the steps with this look on his face. You know that look... it says 'Goddamit'.

Too late.

He was all pissed off and didn't want to go out to dinner, and I said, "Oh for Christ's sakes, we're not sitting at home because you loafed early. Go change your pants."

We've never discussed it. Supposedly poop gets funny as time goes by. Well, enough time hasn't gone for him to laugh about it. I, however, have had enough time.

ha!

_______
.....hugging bunnies since 1969
www.daphneszoo.com

The little shit ass dogs come in to the bathroom and sniff around between the bowl and seat and then sniff and chew at my underwear as I sit and shit.

Any mom knows that you can never poop alone in the kids' early years. It's just not done. We have boy/girl twins. It was either let them in or listen to wailing and banging on the door.

Sometimes, wailing and banging was preferable to the multitudes of questions: "Where does poop come from?" "Where does it go?" "Can I watch it go down?" "Can I watch it come out of your bottom?" (No.)

_______
To affect the quality of the poo, that is the art of life. ~Thoreau, sort of.

Pooping while also potty training does have its advantages and disadvantages! Just don't show your kid how the potty works while you're extremely nauseous during earlier pregnancy. For the longest time lil' shitwit #1 used to "practice" using the potty, then he'd turn around and make puking sounds while leaning over the bowl. I guess that made a lasting impression on him.

_______
Rock-n-roll! Poopy-poo!

I remember having the same pooppy questions Brannie's twins have. I wanted to see it coming out too. I had to laugh out loud on every kid story. And I had to laugh out loud with Daphne for finally sharing such a rich and meaty poop interuption that she was about to keep to herself!
_______
...And their flesh like dung. Zeph. 1:17

I hope you at least got some ice cream on the way home for Mr. Daphne to make up for his accident.
_______
Earth, insane asylum for the universe.