i poop and i vote

Your dog has just taken a big dump on someone else's yard, and your bag has a hole in it. What do you do?

Posted 07.21.2008 by americanPoop (12)





wonderpance (571) -- 07.21.2008

i don't walk my dog, because we have a yard, but i chose #2. unless the bag is just in shreds, you can probably position it in such a way that you can pick up the poop without getting any on you. however, if the bag is completely unusable, i'd probably just leave it. one pile of poop isn't gonna hurt nothin'!
_______
i love poop.

VJESCI (not verified) -- 07.21.2008

.dial divine.

http://67.18.225.180:8080/pml/photos/pinkflamingos.jpg

wonderpance (571) -- 07.21.2008

too bad she's dead!

huh. it's surprisingly difficult to find a picture of Divine eating that dog poop.
_______
i love poop.

Crapper John Mc... (68) -- 07.21.2008

If nobody was watching, I'd totally leave it. Of course, I'd do that even if I had a functional bag.

Great comment! +1 point
prarie doggin (1901) -- 07.21.2008

Wad up a little bit of toilet paper and drop it on the pile. That'll take the heat off the dog and put it on the mailman.

Lame comment! -1 point
count-dookie (7) -- 07.21.2008

definitely leave it
my dog+their yard=their mess

Bilgepump (1629) -- 07.21.2008

IF my bag had a hole in it, I'd be chasing my nuts around the yard, screw the dog shit.
_______

The proper order is kiss me, then go smell the other dog or cat's butt. I cannot stress this enough.

Lame comment!
the poopinantor (not verified) -- 07.21.2008

my friend she was once babysitting this baby and he stinked in his butt so wen she changed him his poop was purple and chiunky there were chunks everywere around the diaper ..... ( tru story)

prarie doggin (1901) -- 07.21.2008

Was his name Barney?

daphne (3512) -- 07.21.2008

I've had this problem before - where the bag had a hole in it or it fell out of my pocket unnoticed. Once, I asked the home owner for a bag after knocking on their door. The other time I used the bag that was around someone's newspaper.


_______
.....hugging bunnies since 1969
www.daphneszoo.com

Anonymous Coward (not verified) -- 07.22.2008

I think I would try to pick it up with the bag. I bet i could carry ift back. Even if it all got onto my hand, a little shit on the hand never hurt anyone.

The Shit Volcano (3737) -- 07.22.2008

Usually I don't have this problem because, like Pance, I have a yard for the dogs. However, when I am on a hike or on those rare occasions when I am out and have to walk the dogs, I frequently just bury the poop with dirt and stuff if faced with this situation. Usually when I am this far away from home it will be a long time before I can wash my hands.

_______
Well, you don't actually blow on it. That's just an expression.

Great comment! +1 point
Thunderbox (812) -- 07.22.2008

I don`t have a dog, but if I did this situation would never arise as it would have been trained to use the toilet like the rest of the family.

Lame comment!
Eoz (not verified) -- 07.22.2008

Um, having a yard for a dog to run around in isn't the same thing as actually walking your dog.
Perhaps you should consider a cat, or a pet rock?

wonderpance (571) -- 07.22.2008

um, there are basically three reasons to walk a dog: to give them exercise, get them outside to poop, and spend quality time with them. all of which can be achieved just as well if not better in a yard.

_______
i love poop.

prarie doggin (1901) -- 07.22.2008

Eoz, I had a pet rock and I had to literally drag it around the block every day.

Eoz (not verified) -- 07.22.2008

"to give them exercise, get them outside to poop, and spend quality time with them."
Unfortunately, this cannot be acheived by having your dog run around a yard. Unless you have a small dog and a yard large enough to walk a circuit, your dog is not getting exercise or interaction with you as alpha, and interactions with new surroundings. I suggest you google it or get a few books on dog care, or speak to a licensed trainer, because you appear to be misinformed... or just lazy.

daphne (3512) -- 07.23.2008

I've got the Dog Whisperer's book, and he also says that the walk is important for bonding and for a dog to feel like a dog, because it recreates the search for food and enforces pack behavior. I cannot walk my dogs for three hours like he suggests (who can), but a half an hour a day make a difference, especially with Gator. He acts as if we've given him the entire world just by taking him around the block. I feel this way when Mr. daphne brings Starburst home for me.


_______
.....hugging bunnies since 1969
www.daphneszoo.com

The Shit Volcano (3737) -- 07.23.2008

My yard is over two acres large and my dogs frequently get exercise this way. They enjoy following me around the yard as I work on irrigation, fence repairs, and other farm tasks. For this reason, there is very little need for walks. Unfortunately, many people do not understand the difference between farm and city life, as they have never been to the country for more than a day or so.

_______
Well, you don't actually blow on it. That's just an expression.

wonderpance (571) -- 07.23.2008

well, my dog is well behaved and in great shape. and she hates walks.

and i am lazy.
_______
i love poop.

Great comment! +1 point
Artful Dodger (345) -- 07.23.2008

Boo for dog nazis. You what the real outrage is? It's people that keep their dogs inside their house/apartment all day long and condition them to think that a quick walk or an hour at the dog park is the way things are supposed to be.

shitwit (545) -- 07.23.2008

I'd leave it if there was no way the poop and my dog could be linked. Kinda the same string of thought as "cop didn't see it, I didn't do it!"

_______
Rock-n-roll! Poopy-poo!

wahhchickawahhwahh (not verified) -- 07.23.2008

well,i agree with volcano,i also live in the country,and city people do not understand slightly what country life is like.i play with my dog in my yard a lot and she follows me around the farm. She gets PLENTY of exercise. i also have a pond that she can swim and cool off in. My goldie is not the smartest box a'rox around... shes still not finished exploring our front porch. None the less, our 3 acre yard,plus all the animals in it...

daphne (3512) -- 07.24.2008

Yeah. I'm a dog Nazi.


_______
.....hugging bunnies since 1969
www.daphneszoo.com

Great comment! +1 point
ChiliKahKah (60) -- 07.24.2008

Please, consider the dog's view.

To him/her, this pile left along a walk is nothing more than a navigation fix. Dogs do not have maps, they have noses. So when they crap in a yard, it is not about being impolite but rather a way of keeping track of where he/she is on the walk. If this were the military it would be called FPS. Fecal Positioning System.

Think of it as a type of land bouy or even a fecal business card !

Postman (311) -- 07.24.2008

PD, I saw your earlier comment about the wad of toilet paper and blaming it on the mailman.

That wouldn't work for me, because I always leave my deposits in the mailbox, or if I'm feeling really frisky, in the pool in the back yard.

Eoz (not verified) -- 07.24.2008

Don't you love how people from the country always go on about how much city folks don't understand country living?
I lived in the country - 700 acre farm - until early adulthood and I've never, ever said that to anyone.

PS - Farm dogs have it GOOD
PPS - 3 acres is not a farm

prarie doggin (1901) -- 07.24.2008

Is that why they require the mailboxes to be
three and a half feet above the street?

wonderpance (571) -- 07.24.2008

sure, daphne. but at least you're nice about it!
_______
i love poop.

Artful Dodger (345) -- 07.24.2008

daph, that wasn't directed at you, darlin.

greenpoopertrooper (334) -- 07.24.2008

I would ask the person who owned the yard for a bag, it's better than having whoever owns the yard to hate you for making him/her pick up the mess
_______
I will never shit somewhere that only has that horrible, scratchy brand of toilet paper. That stuff sucks!

Emmit Brown (not verified) -- 07.25.2008

That's why you walk around with a couple pine cones in your pocket and an empty bag.....when your dog drops a deuce you drop a pine cone while you're reaching down to pick up the deuce and instead pick up the pine cone and put it in the bag......voila!

Hum bunger (107) -- 07.25.2008

ChiliKahKah (44) -- 07.24.2008
Please, consider the dog's view.

monochromatic

black and white

either or

your with us or your against us

A1 Pooter Vision (not verified) -- 07.27.2008

I have a backyard as well. Thankfully picking up poo is not a hot dilemma. Granted I would probably leave it where it fell. PS I suppose it makes sense on a site about poop that there are those wanting to start shit or stir shit up. LOL So how many acres is a farm?

Internet Tough Guy (not verified) -- 07.27.2008

If your dog shits on my lawn and you leave it there, I'll kill you AND your dog.

Anonymous Coward (not verified) -- 07.27.2008

Dog turd in the neighbors yard? Ignore it ! You don't have time for this shit! if the neibor picks it up and throws it back in your yard, pick it up with a plastic bag covered lacrosse stick and aim for his front door (true story Crestview Dr Cornwall NY) Summer 2005 If your reading this Stan Bastard never mess with an Ex Lacrosse player

Neighbor (not verified) -- 07.27.2008

Dogs seem to have a sense of where the property lines and dumping just on the other side. It does seem to imply: "Shit on you!". Thanks neighbor.

turd turdgutson (112) -- 07.27.2008

Nothing like finding a huge-ass dog grogan on your front sidewalk left behind by your imbicilic neighbors and their mangy mutt to really set the tone for the day.

In the past, I've actually collected up dog shit that was left on my lawn, gone to the offender's home, and crammed it in their mailbox. I just wish I could have seen the looks on their faces when they received in THAT particular 'special delivery.'

_______
"...human shit has more of an almond, or perhaps a macadamia flavor to it. I hope you will all take my advice and really consider tasting your poop some time, as I have. It's really quite an experience." - Ratz

prarie doggin (1901) -- 07.27.2008

Usually, in my neighborhood most people pick up after their dogs. If I find a foreign turd (and rule out the mailman) I take my scooper and flick it into the street. There, nature and a few hundred tires will take care of it.

Postman (311) -- 07.27.2008

What's a foreign turd? One that came into the country without a visa?

ChiefThunderbutt (575) -- 07.27.2008

PM.......I believe that would be an illegal alien turd. A good example of a foreign turd would be one that dropped from a rice hole rather than a corn hole.

_______
Eat chilies and feel the burn!!

prarie doggin (1901) -- 07.27.2008

You're right Postman. Most of the foreign turds hanging out by the street in my neighborhood are picked up by passing landscapers.

Postman (311) -- 07.27.2008

Chief, I like your definition.

As far as the poll itself, I couldn't answer because I don't have a dog. Being in my line of work over the last 22 years, I've kind of grown to dislike the little bastards.

daphne (3512) -- 07.31.2008

OK, I've been to the dog Nazi patrol (forums for mastiffs) and have found the resulting information useful.

1.) Someone who has a farm and takes the dogs out to do work is doing the equivalent of "walking the dog" because the work is far away enough from the home that the dog feels taken out from the den, thus resulting in their feeling they've been taken to look for new shit.

2.) Therefore, the "walking of the dog" is not a true black and white fact, but an experience to the DOG.

3.) This means if you have a huge yard and a chihuahua, it could result in the same as walking a big dog 2 miles. The result you want for a day is to give the dog access to new experiences so it does not get bored. This also relies on the breed and type of breed you own.

For example, my laid back American Bulldog who's now up in years delights in half an hour. However, my pit/whippet mix could use more exercise. The whole key is to give your dog new things to do every day, to stimulate their need for different things.


_______
.....hugging bunnies since 1969
www.daphneszoo.com

Bilgepump (1629) -- 07.31.2008

I've got my 13 year old American Eskimo mix rebuilding my boat engine as we speak.
_______

The proper order is kiss me, then go smell the other dog or cat's butt. I cannot stress this enough.

daphne (3512) -- 07.31.2008

How does he hold the machinery without opposable thumbs? Bilgepump, ARE YOU DUCT-TAPING POWER TOOLS TO YOUR DOG AGAIN?


_______
.....hugging bunnies since 1969
www.daphneszoo.com

prarie doggin (1901) -- 07.31.2008

Bilge, those American Eskimo mixes are much better at snowmobile engines.

Bilgepump (1629) -- 07.31.2008

Daphnedear, don't be daft. (I'm so clever!) He's a dog. He has fur, and a tail. I use velcro of course. Dodge, he honed his skills on several Rotax engines, and deciced he wanted to tackle the big Olds 455 Marine engine...he makes me so proud!
_______

The proper order is kiss me, then go smell the other dog or cat's butt. I cannot stress this enough.

daphne (3512) -- 08.01.2008

And just how do you attach the velcro to the dog? DUCT TAPE?


_______
.....hugging bunnies since 1969
www.daphneszoo.com

Bilgepump (1629) -- 08.01.2008

Don't be obtuse, dear lady, I've woven patches of hook and loop into his fur, its very thick and long, no harm has come to my dear best friend, he is NOT, after all, a cat.
_______

The proper order is kiss me, then go smell the other dog or cat's butt. I cannot stress this enough.

prarie doggin (1901) -- 08.01.2008

Bilge, that just gave me an idea. Why not put velcro collars on your cats and velcro strips on the wall next to the toilet. That way you will never have to chase them down when you need them.

Bilgepump (1629) -- 08.01.2008

Got meat hooks for the cats. Hoist them similar to Richard Harris in "A Man Called Horse".
_______

The proper order is kiss me, then go smell the other dog or cat's butt. I cannot stress this enough.

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