i chose the first option. while i wouldn't describe my ass as "perfect," i don't have so much hair that it bothers me enough to remove it._______i love poop.
Had to choose "Other"...I use kerosene and a blowtorch, followed by a treatment of 220 volt electrolysis using jumper cables and the main breaker box.
_______ The proper order is kiss me, then go smell the other dog or cat's butt. I cannot stress this enough.
Dave left out a special cat-egory just for you Bilge. It asked what you do in the spring when your cats are shedding. Enquiring minds need to know.
i'm the one who posts polls (i forgot to send you the email telling you it was posted--sorry!!). i didn't include the question for bidge because there's very limited space in the poll content entry. i wanted to put it in there, though!_______i love poop.
See PD? I told you Bilge did the 220. He's a REAL man... even if he screams like a little girl. _______How I beat IBS
but its such a delightful, precocious scream Ibby...._______ The proper order is kiss me, then go smell the other dog or cat's butt. I cannot stress this enough.
My ass, like my head, is devoid of hair, as a result I do nothing. I must admit that there is a small amount of hair on my head but there is none in the inner recesses of my crack. "Praise his name."
_______Eat chilies and feel the burn!!
I bet it is, Bilge! I imagine it sounds much like the frightened girly scream of Chris Tucker's omnisexual radio host character in The Fifth Element. _______How I beat IBS
I will admit- the way to a clean, odor free bung lies thru the doorway of a handmirror you squat over in the shower, Mach III in hand. Feels so squeaky clean!
My butt is fine. Nothing to braid.
_______.....hugging bunnies since 1969 www.daphneszoo.com
I don't really have any fur. If I did I'd leave it there. Removing ass hair seems weird to me.
I have some hair around my anus, but not enough to give trouble. I have never noticed any problem that I could attribute to that hair, so I have never done anything with it.
I think that you can use Ron Popiel's "flo bee" to de-frizz your butt.
I had to vote other because I use scissors to trim. IT IS NOT MUCH BUT A LITTLE FEELS LIKE ALOT to me. IT'S THAT SENSATIVE THING I HAVE. I'm not yelling. Once or twice I have used the razor. A big itchy mistake every time. I have alot of hair on my head. I used to have two thirds more. After the illness with malnutriton in the nineties and the illness with malnutrition I had a few years ago, I'm lucky I still have hair! Chief, somebody told on me at work, that I got on the internet at work. So now I'm scared to get on even a little bit at work. I don't want to lose my job over my Poopreport addiction.
I picked "other" because I routinely get a Brazilian wax to keep everything clean down there. They take ALL of it off--including the few hairs I may have straggling by my poopchute. I know there aren't many because it never hurts much when they do it.
_______An apple a day keeps the ExLax away!
Runninggrrl2, I've been able to create a Cher collectible human hair wig business on Ebay just from you. THanks for the stimulus!
P.S. Might want to get your hearing checked, it sounds like I'm working with 4" wide strips of velcro when you come in.
I use the redneck gals secret weapon- Duct tape._______Earth, insane asylum for the universe.
The American obsession with depilatories is unnatural. A hairy ass is a joy unto itself! I was getting a full body massage and the gal rubbing me down made a comment about butt hairs extending upward to connect with lower back hair. I have never shaved, trimmed or otherwise altered the hair anywhere on my body, with the exception of haircuts and beard trimming.
I used to have a girlfriend of Mediterranean ancestry with thick dark hair, both on her head and between her legs. She was a tad self-conscious about her butt hair which resembled a tiny whisk broom of black hair just above the anus in the asscrack. She had a fine strip of soft hair down both sides of her pouty little butthole. Gives me wood just thinking about it! Her posterior fur was no barrier to anal sex, so long as adequate lubrication was utilized. I always like a lady with natural fur, the way nature intended! I need to go meet more Italian ladies.....pasta and furburger anyone? Sign me up right now!
Having butt hair presents absolutely no problems and should be cultivated, not shorn!!!
----Captain Craptastic!!!
If u have that much butt hair wax it, never thought of butt hair being that much of a problem...some of yall seem alil too happy with poop, yall must like shitty sex and golden showers
For God's sake, Bilge, pull the switch. Go for it, dude.
Just did, LJ...I've made a resolution to continue at least 3 times a week. I've found that electro-convulsive therapy has provided me with many positives, the least of which is a bald ass.
Just remember. Along with the positives, you need a neutral, and a ground.
Bilge -- you did get the double meaning in my request, right?
Good Lord, I just looked at who's on line and discovered that it's me, you, and Teddy, and that Teddy is between us. And I just felt the earth shake.
Yes, I did, but I wanted the subtlety to remain between you and I, and played the obvious for those unfortunate bastards ill equipped to grasp the not-so-obvious.
I missed the Teddy sighting, but I definitely felt something disturbing the time-space continuum...I had attributed it to some nasty gas. _______ The proper order is kiss me, then go smell the other dog or cat's butt. I cannot stress this enough.
Oh, by the way, LJ, welcome back, hope your trip went well. _______ The proper order is kiss me, then go smell the other dog or cat's butt. I cannot stress this enough.
I like to lay on my stomach and fill my ass crack with Nair. After marinating about an hour, I back up in to a wire wheel spinning at about 3000 rpm. The hair is removed right down to the muscle tissue. A healthy splash of aftershave and I'm good to go.
Prarie. I'm gonna try that tonight but would like your recommendation for aftershave brand. Do they still make Jade East?
So Bilge, my vision is that we work our way in tandem up the board and just roll right past those high achieving assholes.
Let me know when you're ready. I have no idea how many we could rack up in an hour, but am dying to find out.
You left out waxing, so I picked the first :)
Hey LJ, how's it going? Glad to see you back. I'm kind of partial to Clubman aftershave. The kind every goddam barber uses. I really miss when you and Bilge banter back and forth. Please do so, as I've had about enough of this fucking holiday as I can take and need a laugh.
have your spouse hold up a belt sander to your ass. Sure you might lose some ball bits but who'll really notice._______Earth, insane asylum for the universe.
Ah...hell...I was at work, and missed the opportunity...but regardless...I love the fact that Daddy not prarie doggin it made it abundantly clear that he is not, in fact, prarie doggin...the similarity was quite eerie especially that golden shower thing...I envy PD's shower made of gold.
Are you there Bilge? If so, "Tag, you're it."
Razor all the way!
♥ ♥ MeLaNiE ♥ ♥
Welcome aboard Melanie! Have a merry mach 3 Christmas!
Melanie, would that be a Gillette at home, or a hot lather, straight razor shave at your local barber shop?
She sounds pretty young, probably uses Dad's electric razor. Hypothetical conversation at home: Dad: "Melanie? Have you been using my razor? My beard comes in gray and there are some black hair bits in here." Melanie: "Ummm, yeah, I did" Dad: "I don't mind if you use it to shave your legs..." Melanie: "Ummmm, that's not where I was shaving, Dad" (giggles) Dad (look of horror and disgust)
You know there's nothing I hate more than going to see my little Italian barber and finding a lady customer before me bent over the chair, pants down, lathered up butt, getting an ass crack shave. Sheesh, don't those salons do that stuff?
The beard trimmer leaves it short enough not to crust up, but long enough so that my ass doesn't itch.
Melanie's comment reminds me of the incident at band camp with my trumpet!
I also chose razor. Fortunately for me, there's only a few long stray hairs around the brown eye, removing them doesn't cause any problems. I also do it for the man... I don't want him trying to lube me up and get fingers (or something else) caught and tangled up in ass hairs.
As an Indian I just bend over and have my squaw pluck my ass with clam shells.
The Indians used clam shells as currency. Now we know why.
it all starts with the toilet seat... after im done poopin i check for any excess poop/ dingleberrys... then with TP i clinch and pull and the excess poop, at the same time removing and dingleberrys..... a little painful but not to worried
I think the dermatologist will do electrolysis on ass hair...seems like that would take quite a long time and it's not really guaranteed. I'd try it
Electric razor. I keep it trimmed, shaving it the whole way down tends to lead to ingrowns, and that hurts like hell.
Has the poopMeister of this site ever talked about the percentages of those (male/female, gay/straight) who wipe from front to back, or back to front. Please do so! I'm curious...
Ok AC, here's the deal. There are no percentages. Men wipe in any and all directions needed to get the job done. Women wipe front to back to keep the germs out of their vajay-jays. Straight guys don't talk about their asses, as that will make them seem gay, and gay guys multi-task with their asses so they use swirlys to stay minty fresh.
PD You have left out bi-sexual cross-dressing trans-gender midgets... AGAIN!
Why would I want to remove the hair from my ass? I don't even like shaving the hair from my face.
Postman, see "gay guys multi-task with their asses" comment above. That's why. _______How I beat IBS
I like it Mawhawk type on ass or taco..hehe burn it...cherish the smell! nice
The only time I removed some ass crack hair was when I was kinda drunk several years ago and I placed a maxi pad upside down in my underwear. I didn't realize the blooper until I pulled them back up and felt the sticky side now pressed to my patch. I've never felt compelled to repeat that. Ever. _______Rock-n-roll! Poopy-poo!
Holy crap when was the last time I posted?
I have recently started shaving the crack, and it feels surprisingly nice. Not so much while I'm working, because the zero-friction swamp-ass feels kind of chafey, but just hanging out it feels neat-o.
i allways shave my crack ever since i seen my first hair and i will allways will i feel if i let it grow and i take a shit that it would get stuck in my ass hair so thats a good way to think about it i seen one of my exs she had a hairy ass and no hair on the front not the back and the smell was bad yuk to ass hair
Easy, I grab a group of hairs and PULL! Makes my eye's water, but I'm oh, so smooth afterwards.
Au naturel. My wife seems to be dumbfounded by the lack of blemishes or hair on my cheeks – smooth as a baby's. Not real sure about around the stinker, nothing to bother me anyway. I am pretty sure if I somehow gained a bunch of hair there I would not shave it; I'd get the famous Brazilian butt-wax.
What a strange and excellent poll.
_______the dapper crapper – shitting in style... with no stinky ass-hair dingleberries.
pilonidal cysts are sometimes caused by excess ass hair - trust me, poopers, you do not want these cysts...they hurt, they smell HORRIBLE, and they will put you on a hospital bed...SHAVE YOUR ASS LOSERS
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