i never have. but i can't say that i wouldn't consider it if i ever had an amazing poop that i thought everyone needed to see. it would have to be pretty freakin' amazing, though.
_______i love poop.
Yes, I did take picture(s)- was so big it was 2 heaping bowlfuls- I did this to show to my doctor(oddly enough,he didn't dare to see them) to prove the constipation that I had just completed- Doctor had provided me a whole mess of prescriptions to "loosen the wedge", and did so chuckling "this will get you going". Long story short,(maybe I'll write a story ah-la details at a later date) after 2 1/2 weeks of intake/no output- an early sunday morning trip to the drugstore and 2 fleet enema's(self induced) and alot of pushing produced this beautiful 2 part photo session. I still keep the pictures and look at them from time to time as a reminder to NEVER allow this to happen again. Now, if I missed out on the "duty" for more than 2 days, I would be bombarding myself with laxatives,castor oil, whatever it takes to avoid ever experiencing THAT again.
no, no photographs...but I did some marvelous charcoal drawings of some of my more spectacular movements... _______ The proper order is kiss me, then go smell the other dog or cat's butt. I cannot stress this enough.
I'm a photography major at Brown College of Minnesota. For my masters assignment I embarked on a whirlwind tour of lavatories all over campus, taking pictures of the "leavings" found in the commodes. I took over 2000+ pictures of poop and toilets with varying equipment and photographic styles. These were developed by me and then assembled into one vary large decoupage to form a shit spackled toilet, I'd provide a picture but I placed my camera into the bog water of the decoupaged toilet to highlight the fact that we may be able to capture a moment on film but it is fleeting, much like our consumption of food. This idea was born of many hours of looking at Dali's "the persistence of memory" and how it conveyed to me uselessness of life, how we will all become waste through the ravages of time.
P.S. I got a c-
My phone has about a hundred pics of different bowel movements on it. Some are rather beautiful.
I think a good dump is best admired solely by the dumper. Admire that good dump then flush it away. Im sure another award winner is just around the corner. There is no need to photograph the event! Admire.....then flush...move on!_______AHHHHHEMMMMMMMMMM JUST CLEARING MY THROAT!! ;)
I always have a hard time getting the little fuckers to pose. One's always looking away from the camera, or making a stupid face or something. I guess the answer is no.
I was an art major in college, an unsuccessful one who ended up as a meat cutter, and actual abhor most photography. If I were to record my turds for posterity it would have to be in an oil painting. A photograph may accurately portray the physical aspects of a turd but the innate uniqueness will be lacking. We must have a palate of oils and a taut canvas to do each individual turd the service it so richly deserves. The soul of the turd must be captured.
br>_______Eat chilies and feel the burn!!
PD, that was hilarious.
For me, I have snapped a few photos of my work, but only when I go on a Raisin Bran kick, which usually results in some pretty good bowl curlers.
After all, when you start bragging to your friends about the awesome dump you just took, you make want some photographic evidence.
El Scumbag says: "My phone has about a hundred pics of different bowel movements on it. Some are rather beautiful."
You have no kids, right?
LJ, you need to show a little sensitivity here. I've heard he has had several kids, but they all drowned. Don't be too hard on the guy.
I have only taken a Poop Picture once and it had to be documented. It was a perfectly shaped and curled loaf. All the way around the bowl, and the top of the specimen was poking above the water. It looked like the outline of a balloon. It was beautiful.
I photo my shit very seldom but if it has a cool shape to it._______Russell
I haven't, but I have a couple of friends that like to share via picture message when they have a proud moment.
poop is so nasty............
Id have to admit I have takin picd of some memorable dumps.
Always use a a kodak instamatic with the cube of flash bulbs to capture the moment.
Logjam, yes, I do have a kid. My phone holds slightly more pictures of my daughter, but any stranger who found the phone would probably be disturbed to find that it contained mainly pictures of a blond smiling child and brown unflushed turds. Even I am, sometimes.
I find it satisfying to look back on past bowel movements. Chief is right when he says that photos don't properly capture the essence and texture and soul of a turd in the way that an oil painting could, but an oil painting leaves room for imagination and interpretation, while a photograph presents things as they are and it does a reasonable job of stirring the memory as well as offering proof of some of those extraordinary shits that are remarkable in size, shape, colour, location (after all, tales of the upper decker are all very well, but it's something else to get a photograph of it) or unusual texture (corn, peanuts and the like).
As an experiment, I would recommend to anyone that they keep a photographic journal of their own arse production for a couple of weeks, along with a diary of exactly what they have eaten. The results can be quite fascinating. You'd be surprised at the variety in your poo over a short period of time.
The only photo of a turd that I took was in a petrol station toilet in the middle of the wilds of Brazil in 1986. The reason being was that this beast of a turd that someone deposited was a good 15" long and about 3" diameter, lying propped upright against the back of the toilet bowl. That must have hurt badly coming out.
If I ever took a photo of one in the future it would be in grainy black and white with high contrast for the artistic effect.
As much as I love this site, taking pictures of poop is where I get off the train.
_______.....hugging bunnies since 1969 www.daphneszoo.com
I'd take a picture for one reason - something really bad happened and I needed to show my doctor. _______You have the right to remain Silent but Deadly....
Daphne watch your step on the platform.
El Scumbag (469) -- 04.07.2009 My phone has about a hundred pics of different bowel movements on it. Some are rather beautiful. Scummy - for fucks sake never get run over!
I never have, but I'm not above it. Maybe it if looked really off and words couldn't explain it. I might take the shot and bring it to the doctor's for diagnosis.
The only photo I have of poop is one of my daughter on a lawn with a steaming pile of dog shit a few feet behind her in the background. Needless to say, that one didn't make it into a frame.
Why yes I do photograph my shits. I take a picture of every single one that I have saved in several hundred scrapbooks documenting my fecal adventures from teenagerhood through my adult life. I like to do fun little scrapbook pages with like beach themes and such for different seasons and occasions. I also type up a little entry for the mood I was in, the birth of the brown baby and what my diet was at the time. Ah memories. _______Earth, insane asylum for the universe.
Once my brother kept harassing everyone with a camcorder so I went into the back bedroom and hatched a real tear jerker, I mean this bastard was a blue ribbon winning TURD! It was all the way down in the hole on one end and beached up on the porcelain about 5 inches on the other. I intentionally did not flush.
I Went and got some left over sparklers from a new years party and skewered the beast with a couple. It was big and thick enough to hold em both straight up! I took the used wipe out in a plastic bag to the dumpster and returned to the kitchen.
My brother returned and continued to put the camcorder in my face so I just started walking away with him following me the whole way, finally making it to the scene of the trap. I said "hey dude get out" Hey just kept laughing and saying "why?" in a real teasing "Why are you hitting yourself" brother tone. I had a lighter in one hand and while he was leaning around the shower curtain trying to get in my face, I leaned over and lit the sparklers. He was shocked and disturbed, but couldn't stop laughing or filming. After the sparklers went out I gave him the required home video flip off and said "Welp, It ain't gonna get no bettrn'nat!" He agreed and decided that was a good place to call cut. hand_______Don't move the truck I'm still on the bucket!
On occasion I do take pictures of photo-worthy bowel movements, especially since I am on heart medication that has changed my bowel function. The last couple of days, though, I have tried taking pictures of my anus (not easy!) because it really hurts; one picture showed a definite raw red area, so I went to the drugstore and bought Balneol and some hemorrhoid pads. Only one b.m. since, but my butt certainly felt better after using that combo to finish wiping. I do have some pictures of decent poops on my computer; my cellphone is old-fashioned and doesn't take pictures.
I just took a photo worthy dump, but since I didn't have my cell phone with me, it will have to remain undocumented.
Shouldn't have any trouble producing more of those, since I've been eating a lot of Double Fiber wheat bread lately.
Wow, PD, you can occassionally get those "...little fuckers to pose?" Man, I can never get mine to cooperate, much less fuck. I mean, they always just lay there lolligagging in their own stew, no matter how hard I try to train them. I've tried treats and fresh water, cajoling and cursing. I finally called it quits when I found myself threatening them with a shit chopper (aka abortion tool, in other circles). Heck, the only neat trick I've ever been able to get mine to do is to run down the beaver hole in the bottom of the commode.
It's still kind of unclear to me, though, PD. So what do you do with them little fuckers? Are you running some kind of shit pornography ring?_______My special needs student crapped in your honor roll student's backpack.
Poop Porn. Uh oh. I hear the sirens approaching PD's house now. Flush the evidence PD, flush!
_______To affect the quality of the poo, that is the art of life. ~Thoreau, sort of.
This would not be a good time for the toilet to clog.
I occasionally take a pic of the end product. That is usually after I have been constipated for a few days. I do not show the pics to anyone though. They are just stored in my computer, under a code name.
_______In search of the ever evasive BM
Shitake boy: Closet Poo Pictures. I think you need an intervention. You need to admit your undercover activities. "I am Shitake boy. I am a Poo Picture Taker." _______To affect the quality of the poo, that is the art of life. ~Thoreau, sort of.
no absolutely no, but yes for my girl friends poop,i would love to collect all photos of her shit.
I took a picture of my dog taking a crap directly beneath a "No Dumping" sign... does that count?_______Help for IBS
IBSalot, I need to see that pic! That's better than my pic (really) of a store downtown, "Hung Doung's Meat Market." _______To affect the quality of the poo, that is the art of life. ~Thoreau, sort of.
I had a net gf once who on a daily basis emailed me her daily shits, I would of married the girl except I'm in oz and shes usa, oh well still it was the hi light of the day opening that email showing her nummy brown present for me. Sadly Ive never found a local girl who would share with me. Its a great turn on having a younger sexy girl shit for you and let you play with it. photos would be better if they were scratch and sniff
Have never taken a picture of my poop, come to think of it. I have taken pictures of other people's poops though a few times. These have been patients of mine and at the request of their physician. Guess the doc wanted to see if any corn was showing up.
With my digital camera, taking a photo of my crap becomes so much easier now, if I were to do that. None of this having another person develop photos. I alone would know of the photo subject matter, that is, until I decided to share the photo. How about that for an email attachment! Hey, look what I made this morning! Isn't that a beauty!?! ----Captain Craptastic!!!
I am a turd herder and taking pictures proves the success I have corralling them into the bottom of the bowl. I never use a cover as TP is a no no in my wierd. o_______
Poopingly proud, Terdriffic
I've never done it, but I suppose I would if I had a reason to. Like, say, I found that asshole who tailgated me in the passing lane because I wasn't going 90 miles per hour to pass a swaying double-trailer logging truck in 100 MPH winds. I could patch it to his rich-fucker cell phone and let him see what I REALLY think of his fancy silver V-8 pick-up that he never uses outside of the city.
Then again, why take a picture of it when I could just stuff it under his door handle in the parking lot? (But turd terrorism is wrong! Wrong! *walks away from truck and tosses shit in the toilet*) _______I found Jesus! He was behind the sofa the whole time!
We do it all the time, and we don't just send them to each other. We like to bless our friends with them as well. Even going as far as to find the perfect ringtone to go with the picture message. Our favorite ones to use are the chorus of "A Moment Like This" by Kelly Clarkson and "Beautiful" by Christina Aguilera
Dave quoted on CNN:
http://edition.cnn.com/2009/LIVING/wayoflife/07/07/mf.toilet.paper.history/index.html?iref=mpstoryview
And that relates to this poll how?
I heard that Wolf Blitzer pooped oncet. I heard that there are pictures. Does that count new coven? I know it's a round-about relativity kind of thing, but I feel that this brings everything together. I know I feel better anyway. _______To affect the quality of the poo, that is the art of life. ~Thoreau, sort of.
i just voted, other. In december 08 i pooped on a pad on my bed in my sleep when i had fecal obstruction. I took a picture of my brown butt print on the pad as it was kind of cute. If you want to see it, I can only email it to another phone that accepts pic mail._______...And their flesh like dung. Zeph. 1:17
I think Bilge has one of those phones. I'll try to get you the number.
Where has Mr. Pump been these last couple of days anyway? I kind of miss him. _______...And their flesh like dung. Zeph. 1:17
Stalking you, SP...oh damn...blew my cover...sonova....need a new target.
_______ The proper order is kiss me, then go smell the other dog or cat's butt. I cannot stress this enough.
I thought i felt eyes peeping in on me. You peeping pump,you._______...And their flesh like dung. Zeph. 1:17
Sounds kind of erotic, doesn't it...hmmmm...I may have a new occupation.
Let me know where you will be working Bilge. I have a mobile window washing business planned.
Dear Mobile Window Washing:
How much do you charge? Our shower doors need cleaning.
Dream Girls Fitness Center _______To affect the quality of the poo, that is the art of life. ~Thoreau, sort of.
PD, I know I'm swamped with my duties here at DTI, but I'm more than willing to work weekends for Mobile Window Washing. In fact, I'm more than willing to take the first job at Dream Girls.
One of my friends at work sends picturs of his poop via picture message on cell phone. He titles them as if they're works of art. Although strange, it's funny and contageous. I began sending mine to him as well.
Postman, you are too valued an employee here at DTI to let go on such a horrible and dangerous road trip. I will have to bite the bullet and take this one myself. No need to thank me. If however, you have some free time on the weekends, those windows defiled by Peepingpump should be getting a bit crusty by now. Bring an ice scraper.
Your esteemed colleague, PD
Because of peepingpump peeing on my window sash, I need some cleaners right now! He must have gotten a little excited._______...And their flesh like dung. Zeph. 1:17
Good news for you professor Doggin, I live next to Dream girls and I am very familiar with their problem and have peepe....uh..looked in on it already. I also think I know what has caused the stains on the shower doors.
_______Eat chilies and feel the burn!!
SP, thats not pee. You might need an enzyme cleaner, and watch out, those sashes might be stuck shut by now.
If it is not pee, then what is it? Ooh, MR. PUMP HAVE YOU BEEN JERKING AROUND MY WINDOW SILL AGAIN?!_______...And their flesh like dung. Zeph. 1:17
Yes, I have, and its delicious...the jerked chicken, lamb, beef, and fish, that is...sorry some of the sauce got on your sill. Fella has to eat when on a stake out, you know.
Sshhh Bilge, Daphne may be around. You DID say jerk carrots, jerk cucumbers, and jerk bananas?
Awe, that is all? I thought PD was referring to something else._______...And their flesh like dung. Zeph. 1:17
Well do your sashes have a nice satin glaze to them?
Ah hah, yes, so we are talking about the same thing. BILGE PEEPING PUMP!!! You better come clean these new windows of mine. Daw gone it!_______...And their flesh like dung. Zeph. 1:17
Couldn't help it, jerked chicken always gets me excited.
Dog on it! I can't open the window! That's it! I'm calling my brother! He's head of an institute so that make him big shit! So you better be scared of him!! PD! Make that peeping pump come clean up his sticky mess. The last time I looked, there was no fertility institute next door._______...And their flesh like dung. Zeph. 1:17
(Nudges PD) hey dude, she's looking for you, put down the binoculars...oh, and wipe your chin, you're drooling again. _______ The proper order is kiss me, then go smell the other dog or cat's butt. I cannot stress this enough.
We have some windows that need cleaning. (from the inside.) Bring CLR.
Fertility Institute. _______To affect the quality of the poo, that is the art of life. ~Thoreau, sort of.
(2:37 AM).........HI BILLY MAYS HERE FOR COCKSEE CLEAN. GOTTA WINDOW SASH STUCK SHUT.....COCKSEE CLEAN, GOTTA PAIR OF UNDERWEAR STIFF AS A BOARD.......COCKSEE CLEAN, RUN A SPERM BANK FOR THE BLIND.......COCKSEE CLEAN. IT WORKS LIKE A WHIZ TO CLEAN UP YOUR JIZZ. Only $19.95 plus shipping and processing, but call RIGHT NOW and we will supersize your order. Here's how to order.
+1 Comment Prairie Doggin. You made me shit my pants laughin! _______To affect the quality of the poo, that is the art of life. ~Thoreau, sort of.
Thank you BL, it was a tribute to a great man. And yes I did post it at 2:37 am. I got a call from work, and had to go on the computer. That's when it hit me.
Sorry about the pants. Send them here to DTI. Attention Postman.
That would explain that big knot on your forehead.
Yes, I was hoping the computer would go down on me, but just had to open my yap and tell it that looked a bit heavy.
Thong is on the way by Fed Ex. The driver looked at me funny when he picked it up. _______To affect the quality of the poo, that is the art of life. ~Thoreau, sort of.
No wonder we can't get a decent softball team formed you guys are all to busy on a stake out! That's it I'm confiscating those binoculars....on second thought I'll get my own these are to white and sticky._______Earth, insane asylum for the universe.
We don't have to have a good softball team...I just want an excuse to get together with friends and drink
Drink???
Ahem. Yeah. Drink._______To affect the quality of the poo, that is the art of life. ~Thoreau, sort of.
My feelings are hurt because you said I'm not a good team player. I quit!_______...And their flesh like dung. Zeph. 1:17
Bran, sorry about the funny looks from your Fedex guy. I didn't mean to send you the clear plastic prepaid envelope.
Those Fed Ex guys are so prissy.
Yesterday I wished that my cell phone took pictures. I went to the restroom of the local Target store (pronounced tar-ZHAY, of course) and found two massive turds in the toilet, each at least an inch and a half thick and several inches long. I thought immediately of taking a picture, but couldn't, of course; so I flushed it away and did my own, not nearly so big.
Awe, bummer, MSG!_______...And their flesh like dung. Zeph. 1:17
OK, what's the bummer--(a) that I couldn't take the picture, or (b) that my own poop wasn't as big? Either way, I agree. I'd love to have a cell phone that takes pictures; I'd feel so up-to-date, hip, and modern (and I'm sure opportunities would come to use it)! And I'd love to have big long logs again; but that doesn't appear likely, so I'll be content just to be able to poop however I do.
Bummer that you couldn't take a picture of the big turds...but bummer again that your turds were'nt as big. You are funny, MSG._______...And their flesh like dung. Zeph. 1:17
MSG, your cell phone doesn't take pictures? You need to go out and upgrade that thing. And get one that also takes video. Then you'll always have it handy the next time you need it.
That Target wouldn't happen to have been one in Nashville? Sorry, I thought I flushed, lol. Just kidding. About a year ago, my wife dropped a load off that was in the shape of a penis. She still has it to this day, and we have blessed many of our friends with it numerous times. Thinking about that picture, I think I have the perfect ringtone for it. Pass your numbers on to us, and you will see what we come up with, lmfao.
No, the Target wasn't in Nashville; we live outside Richmond, VA, and the store is in a suburban mall. It's handy to us, so I go there fairly often. (Sometimes I GO there, too, if you follow me.)
When you said she still has it to this day I was thinking she fished it out, bronzed it and had that bitch mounted on the wall above the fireplace. "And this is my wife's giant penis shaped turd."_______Earth, insane asylum for the universe.
That gives me an idea. A turd bronzing service. It can be a subsidiary of DTI. Now we just need somebody to head it up, so to speak.
If Brannie wern't at work, I'm sure she would be first to take the job, Posty._______...And their flesh like dung. Zeph. 1:17
The smokey, metallic aroma of a turd being dipped into molten bronze can be quite intoxicating. I understand it smells a bit like varmint stew. Am I close Chief?
Another new branch for the ever expanding DTI, aromatherapy!
Can I steel a rabbit turd to bronze as mine? Their is nothing solid enough to grab onto today._______...And their flesh like dung. Zeph. 1:17
Oh, the great poopreport brain trust. Although the thought of a bronzed turd is an interesting theory, we sadly didn't preserve the one in question to hang on our living room wall or above the mantle. We only have the memory of the picture.
I have been told in no uncertain terms that my face resembles a turd. I have many photos of my face so why waste time on photographing a turd?
Yes I have only if I felt that they were photo worthy.
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