If your turds were a movie title, which would they most resemble?

// 68 Comments
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68 Comments on "If your turds were a movie title, which would they most resemble?"

wonderpance's picture
Comment Quality Moderatork 500+ points
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look! it's a new poll!
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i love poop.

i love poop.

MSG's picture
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Nice new poll question. I don't have a good answer right now because I don't think there is a movie called "The more things change, the more they stay the same." My poop is never the same two days in a row, but it's always poop--sometimes a little harder, sometimes softer, sometimes long, sometimes short; you get the idea. I am keeping a log of my poops for 2010, including brief descriptions, and so far I haven't repeated myself, though most of the movements have been healthy and large, just different in detail. When I think of an apt title, I'll come back to this thread. If any of you have suggestions, I might adopt one.

Rattle yer Dags's picture
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"A Series of Unfortunate Events"

Anonymous Coward's picture
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I'd have to say"I love a Mystery", sometimes
a cable folded back n'forth, sometimes a couple of logs, and sometimes, something from the modern sculpture exhibit at the art gallery. I dunno what it is...but it's mine....

Bilgepump's picture
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"The Devil's Rejects"
I really don't think an explanation is necessary.

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The proper order is kiss me, then go smell the other dog or cat's butt. I cannot stress this enough.

"One of the founding members of the Front Page Hyena Pack, and runs as its alpha male when the urge strikes him, which is often." Daphne (one perceptive chick)

runninggrrl2's picture
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"Attack of the Killer Tomatoes". I have crapped out whole cherry tomatoes on more occasions than I'd like to count. Guess I need to chew those suckers a little more, eh?


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An apple a day keeps the ExLax away!

An apple a day keeps the ExLax away!

grande impulso's picture
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Mine would be Titanic. or i think Devils Rejects and A series of unfortunate events describe it pretty good too!

prarie doggin's picture
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"The Good, the Bad and the Ugly"

But mostly the latter two.

SemiRegular's picture
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"The soft, the hard, and the damned."


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La la la la la, WIPE!
"Prune juice gives you the sh!its!" -- NR

La la la la la, WIPE!
"Prune juice gives you the sh!its!" -- NR

ChiliKahKah's picture
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The Great Escape

Pantload's picture
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"The Running Man"

What's so funny 'bout poop, love, and understanding?

What's so funny 'bout poop, love, and understanding?

IBS NO MORE's picture
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Das Boot sums it up nicely for me now. So much better than the Krakatoa I had for 5 years straight.

(LOL @ Rattle n Bilge n PD... those were funny!!)
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Open your eyes AND your mind to the power of food!
Health via Food (scroll down to read by chapter)

When you say the word “poop,” your mouth makes the same motion your butthole does when pooping…
The same can be said for the phrase “explosive diarrhea.”

El Scumbag's picture
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If the vast eye-watering Leviathon that I pushed out with a grunt and a whimper this morning is anything to go by, I'd have to say "Titanic".

ChiefThunderbutt's picture
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This morning I sprayed out a substance that could have been featured, from appearance only, in, "Willy Wonka and the Chocolate Factory."

Yesterday it was, "The Dirty Dozen." I donned a latex glove, captured Lee Marvin and have him in a jar for further interrogation.


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Eat chilies and feel the burn!!

How long a minute is depends on what side of the bathroom door you're on!

prarie doggin's picture
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To be released (literally) soon, "Snakes on a Plane".

(Much to the chagrin of the passengers in the rear)

Squat-n-leaveit's picture
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As good as it gets!

Asssssss's picture
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The Bowel Redemption.
The Brown Mile.

prarie doggin's picture
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"An Inconvenient Poop"

Time to change the underwear Al.

Deja Poo's picture
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I wanted to say "Men in Brown" but because it always seems to explode out of me like the guy with the egg/embryo in his chest, I'm going with "Aliens".
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Yo quiero Taco Bell.

Yo quiero Taco Bell.

pnuttycorn's picture
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A river runs through it.

I pee out my ass quite a bit.

Squat-n-leaveit's picture
Comment Quality Moderatork 500+ points
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Bedind the Green Door

Annie3456's picture
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Mine would be a film about a couple, because they always, always come in two's, and sometimes they even have a little baby turd that comes at the end. But the two first ones are always the same size.

RoboCrap13's picture
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"Clue" - The past couple of days, I've found myself asking "When did I eat corn recently?"
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You have the right to remain Silent but Deadly....

You have the right to remain Silent but Deadly....

prarie doggin's picture
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Robo, you don't actually have to eat corn. You can eat corn flour and those fucking little corn molecules will actually clump together, reform into a kernel and polish itself to a nice luster before coming out. When the universe finally ends in a big bang, all that will be left is a stream of corn light years in length.
At least those are my theories.

TRT's picture
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Pan's Labyrinth.

Because it looks like one of those "Which pipe connects to Mr Jone's house?" puzzles you used to get in children's annuals.

Rebekkah's picture
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Usually Das Boot, but of late, Apocalypse Now. My bum has turned into Kurtz.

mrharryrules's picture
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"Tsunami"

theotherroyalplunger's picture
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DOOM, and Day After Tommorrow!

Anonymous Coward's picture
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wtf kind of site is this? rofl.

TheMightyAss's picture
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King Kong? I needed fighter jets to shoot at it until it dropped off...

Bran Lover's picture
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The Blob.
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To affect the quality of the poo, that is the art of life. ~Thoreau, sort of.

To affect the quality of the poo, that is the art of life. ~Thoreau, sort of.

Captain Craptastic's picture
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"Das Boot" complete with ominous German classical music! My poops are often like the scene when the "boot" gets slammed by depth charges and sinks to the bottom. Only difference is they repaired the "boot" and came back to the surface. My poops just lay there at the bottom and look sullen and stubborn until being sent on the strange and wonderful journey to the treatment plant.
----Captain Craptastic!!!

----Captain Craptastic!!!

ChiefThunderbutt's picture
PoopReport of the Year AwardComment Content ModeratorComment Quality Moderatorf 5000+ points
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"Attack of the Killer Tomato Skins", they were rolled up but dangerous.


_______
Eat chilies and feel the burn!!

How long a minute is depends on what side of the bathroom door you're on!

baron von crapalot's picture
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Forest Dump...... just keeps on runnin
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Did I just fart?.... Oh shit! NO!!

I hope to god I've just sat in a Shepard's pie.

Anonymous Coward's picture
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Furry Vengeance after I had some fuzzy veggies.

Navy Man's picture
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The Unsinkable Molly Brown

Anonymous Coward's picture
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Dump and circumstance because sometimes my dump comes spontaneously or The Toxic Avenger!

Anonymous Coward's picture
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Fever Pitch cuz it is always smokin hot

The Anyomous Crapper's picture
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Das Poop. Hands down.

poo pot pie's picture
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So I Married an Ass Murderer- a terrifying idea with a lot of humor!

Bilgepump's picture
Comment Quality Moderatorh 3000+ points
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Not too shabby, PPP, I like that one.


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The proper order is kiss me, then go smell the other dog or cat's butt. I cannot stress this enough.

"One of the founding members of the Front Page Hyena Pack, and runs as its alpha male when the urge strikes him, which is often." Daphne (one perceptive chick)

ChiliKahKah's picture
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Then there is the classic "B" movie called the Toxic Avenger !

Bran Lover's picture
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Did anyone take "Poop Fiction?"
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To affect the quality of the poo, that is the art of life. ~Thoreau, sort of.

To affect the quality of the poo, that is the art of life. ~Thoreau, sort of.

power pooper's picture
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Snakes Down the Drain.

lots of long, thin, squishy, snakes that slither halfway down the drain and the other ends stay lurking under the water like they might slither back up and bite my ass.

MSG's picture
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I like 'Poop Fiction,' but in my case it's closer to 'Poop Reality."

RoboCrap13's picture
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"Urban Legend" I've had a couple of times when my mind wonders "How the hell did I pass that without ripping something?"
_______
You have the right to remain Silent but Deadly....

You have the right to remain Silent but Deadly....

Anonymous ass's picture
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Flubber :D!

mylittleterdy's picture
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"The Firm", "The Breakfast Club",
"The Magnificent Seven", "St. Elmo's Fire" or "Die Hard"

Anonymous Coward's picture
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"The Hangover"

Waterworld

SaTURDay Night Fever,

also did not see..."Dirty Harry" or "The Terminator"

For those Tom Hanks fans... "Sleepless in Seattle", "Splash", "Big", or "Castaway"

Anonymous Coward's picture
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Nightmare Before Christmas, The Adventures of Scooby Doo.

"Frequency"