My love for the finer points of pushing out some brown has been long understood. Few people can apreciate the pleasure of a nice relaxing crap. For some people, relaxing is all about finding their happy place. For me, relaxing is all about finding an empty stall.
My first choice is either of my two bathrooms at home. Second choice is the 11th floor bathroom at work. It's a nice quiet floor where I have yet to encounter anyone else using the bathroom at the same time as me.
Old style un-restricted flow toilets. None of this new age .5 liter flush action that can't clear the bowl in less than 3 flushes.